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| I think I may have found my problem in life.
by simbasfriend at 5/25/2008 9:35:05 AM
I was listening to a really good song today and it was I think supposed to be about a lover scorned but then I thought about it and it applies to me and my life and my relationship with my father. The major male factor in my life.
The Song goes like this:
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because you know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with
Because of you
I am afraid
This pretty much defines my life. I am always supposed to be perfect. I am not allowed to make mistakes. When I do I get called stupid etc... How can a girl or woman ever meet a man she can trust or love when the biggest influence in her life has made her this way. I cannot even tell my father how I feel I am so scared of him. Actually I think I have been scared of him all my life which is why I think I have the need to be perfect. If you are perfect you don't get yelled at.
Maybe acknowleging my problem I can try to change...
Colleen
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