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| 2009/05/03
by slip_kid at 5/4/2009 1:11:47 AM
I find myself at a loss right now to sum up what I'm feeling. I guess that could be the result of a lack of sleep, but I think a large dosage of confusion is contributing somewhat as well. I guess I don't want to be too specific about what's bothering me right now because I don't want any specific person to think this rant might be about her.
Anyway, I spent the afternoon today trying to help a friend with a few things. It was mostly minor things that she felt she might need help with, but truthfully, I think she could've done them on her own if she had wanted to. She had been going through some relationship problems with a "former" boyfriend and I guess she was just lonely. I didn't mind offering some support and comfort; actually, it felt pretty good to be able to help. However, I've been having "relationship" (or lack thereof) issues of my own and could have used some comforting too. Unfortunately, though, I didn't feel that it was appropriate to bring my problems up when she was so focused on her own.
It's not really that I'm experiencing difficulties with a person with whom I'm involved; I'm not "involved" with anyone... and I guess that's the problem.
It was probably a big help to me to be able to spend some time with this friend. I've been pretty lonely over the past few days (or weeks?) and feel more-or-less deserted. However, listening to her express her grief over her own problems, if anything, seemed to make me feel worse about my own. I'm not sorry that I was able to help her, or to make her feel better, but I didn't get much of an opportunity to express my own grief and I feel that I probably need to.
Well, it's pretty late right now and my thoughts are beginning to get kind of blurred, so I guess I'd better close this here...
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