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| My Tears Are Too Heavy
by kaydrian at 8/7/2009 3:31:49 PM
I finally have a pen, paper and some time to myself.
To let everyone know what's been on my mind so I can help better my health.
My mother is dealing with my sister lack of responsibility of her kids.
My nieces love me so much that when they show me it, everyone else look like wow they wonder which one is his.
My grandma is going up against the world, her children treating her like they don't even care.
They pretend to love her for what they want, then just pretend like she's isn't there.
I wish that I was back in Connecticut, where I won't have to be bother with this bulls**t.
But In memory and love for my father, I just suck it up and help deal with it.
My Cheyenne crying everyday cause she has to sit there with her mother doesn't care while her father behind bars.
They don't better themselves for the love of who you were, then let me love for who you are.
You're more then my guiding light, You're my shining star.
Then I stay up in the middle of every night to watch Brianna go up against this nightmare she fights.
She yells, scream, scratches and bites and all I can do is hold her close with all might.
Then my baby niece looks up at me with those gorgeous eyes.
Sometimes in the middle of the night, I just rock her sleep while I cry.
I trying my hardest to stay away from drug, no drinking.
Don't get put in jail, no fighting and keep away from gang banging.
Once in awhile, I look up to the sky and ask my father why.
As much as I try, these tears I got are too heavy to hold inside.
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