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| Reaching Out; afraid of the Risk to Self-Esteem
by lloyd53a at 8/16/2009 5:33:22 PM
Guilty am I to such a "crime" upon me and others; afraid of a bruised ego should I be rejected upon "reaching out" for a little conversation.
But, people are "funny" (including me); somewhat unpredictable, inconsistent, with fickled tastes and changing priorities.
We want physical closeness but (generally) that's where similarities end; men want their options kept open 'case the grass is greener across the way. Women want loyalty in exchange for exposing their vulnerabilities and giving that which is precious to them beyond numerals.
We want to "talk" but (generally) that's where commonality stops; men want to define the issues and rapidly move onto solutions. Women want to be heard and understood; sharing emotions/feelings beyond the bedroom.
We don't want to be alone but (generally) beyond that divergences take-a-hold; men want some-one there... sometimes to talk and sometimes to be still but (for me) always, always to hold on to "you". Women (some in my experience) get nervous at the lack of dialogue, suspicious of the silence as if it's a symptom of something wrong between her and her man. And (in my experience) such has lead to dismall results... the man not being believable that a reflective moment is needed... and the woman not believing such... tending to believe the worst.
So, what's the solution to this delima? Of like needs but of different interpretations regarding satisfaction?
As always, it's a matter of compromise, give-n-take with neither seeking to gain the upper hand.
But, is that achievable given the nature of the "Human Condition"(?) (which) is a gentle label for our entrenched nature to (often) be selfish, controlling, testing and contradictory.. to be just plane mean and spiteful.
And, once "first blood" has been drawn and it's tainted the clear/pure "water" that held a relationship bouyant, perhaps it needs to be accepted that there is no "going back"; it's time to move on to some "thing" else; but not as a play-boy nor charlett... no, no. For when things were good they where in Heaven. Parting with memories of love and respect and before the bitterness buried all such.
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