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| Negativity, Do You Use It Too Much?
by somethingrare at 9/7/2009 10:57:22 PM
I believe we all suffer from this in one way or another. I see a lot of threads in the forum that are negative and I wonder. Once even tried to open a thread in hopes of teaching people that positive is better.
Men and women often asking, "Where are all the good men/women?" "Why are all men/women?" this or that. A lot of things that make you wonder, "Why would anyone want to talk to those types?" They lump all men or women into one category.
But the truth is we as people in general prefer to hear the bad over the good. News is boring if its all good. I guess it gives us the power of going, "Well I am better then that." Builds our own ego. But when your the talker of negativity you fail to realize that people then start looking at you in a darker light.
He is jaded because he believes there are no more good women in the world. She is jaded because all of the men are after her for sex only.
Now there are ways to get around this. I know the truth is they want someone to acknowledge them. A lot of us want some sort of support.
I would think the best idea is to attempt to avoid using words like "All, Everyone and such" when asking a general question. Perhaps, "How can I find a good man? I seem to pick up morons."
Of course when women/men ask "Why are all... Where are all..." and such, they get a ton of replies. Some folks offended at being included in the bulk, some jaded and wanting to toss in their supporting remarks, and some trying to indicate that they themselves are good.
But did the person with the negativity gain any ground? Not in my eyes. Its like the person at work. "I hate working here!" Then why are you working there? My "Ex" is always... Then why are you dealing with them? People see and here these negative things and it really doesn't show who you really are. It just shows that your jaded in some way.
I like that word, "Jaded" learned it this last week. It means tarnished, turned against, have anger toward or for. At least this is the translation I gathered from it.
So how much negativity do you have? I will be first to admit I have a bit of it myself. I try to tie my tongue up though. You'd be amazed at the comments I don't say due to them being smart mouthed and a bit negative.
When I see a thread of "Where are all the good guys?" I want so bad to reply, "And why would I want to date you?" But think of that. Just because the person is good doesn't mean they want to date you. If they don't want to date you, then surely they aren't good anyway. Another of those catch 22 things.
Maybe the question should then read, "Are there any good guys that would like to date me?" This isn't a negative thread and it indicates a fact. You want to date a good guy. Trouble is it opens you up to 2 types of people. Those that love to insult you and those who will think your being a bit too forward. You'd get a ton of insults. "WHY?" Because again a lot of people seem to focus on negativity.
Amusingly a lot of folks don't like Optimistic people. I think its due to their positive nature. The optimistic person tries to keep a good outlook. Negative folks find this to be boring. There is a lot of drama in being negative. Though most say they don't want drama, how many of those prefer drama movies other type of movies? We want the intense moments it causes. Conflicts do cause tension, though in a negative way.
The Optimistic is boring. They wait for things to improve. Surely it will get better. They work for that better idea while the world pulls at them. Yet a lot of people says they want Positive people in their lives. This is a truth, the only problem is we are drawn to the negative side of life.
But wouldn't you rather attract people due to positivity? We all want to get rid of the drama in life. Not going to be done with negativity. Positive folks are looking for positive folks. This saying
"Opposites attract" isn't all that true. There are some of us who can point out two people who are alot alike and happily married for years.
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