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by 1957r at 9/15/2009 1:09:38 PM
More often I find that in my personal history: Though I have an abundancy of great and beautifull pictures in the memories, and tend of course to not only see them,but choose them. It is not with out the pain and terror accompanied in it. All good is hidden in the negative, not so much as a reality as it is a fact. I have great and glorius pictures amidst the horror of the times they are in. So I see the wonder of the sunrise over the Mojave and the unimaginable beauty accompanied with the 180k people scrambling the desert floor, the rise of dust clouds from the vehicles racing one another towards the south objective and the color stirred by the aproach. I saw a rock of torqouise 4" tall and 2.5' wide in the crack of a rock[500' granite] face while I ate lunch. I remember the good things, I actually put out the effort to find it no matter the bad I must see also. Yet though for the masses acceptability in personal and historical negatives is the claimed desire- so far as it shows, either the memories I claim paint a picture of this ongoing party; or when the black reers it's head and the memory extracted? Then it is unacceptable, or worse. I like many have no desire for any human to see what is the bad or dark. But I do acknowledge it in myself and most importantly see it in others. So then what is my beef? Judgement calls, unacceptability in the fact I am a different person than most, experienced the ugly in the human to other humans- I have been accepted as the sum of all I am only once. I know now that it can be- unfortunately though her dear ole  dad was a patriarcle battle scarred controller. I have a problem accepting that extreme. So then it is almost impossible to couple with a person for the acceptance level must be honest and true.  do try to remember that I like most had no idea of it all, did not volenteer for these things and existed in them regardless-
As a point of referrence be it known:
I am a former Jarhead, infantry assault, scout, out in "79" son of a navigator [B-52's] and a single parent since 1991. Still water runs deep; don't it?
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