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| Thoughts, Musings, Contemplations
by evagoblog at 10/3/2009 11:21:54 PM
I find it somewhat sad, that people in the age range I’m looking for seem so obsessed with looks. Yes, of course you need mutual physical attraction but when you get to be past 40, it would seem that one has more to offer than just good looks (which we must admit is fading). I have a buddy who has spent thousands of dollars on plastic surgery but what I find beautiful about him that will NEVER fade with time and why I am smitten with him (much to both our dismays as he feels we‘re incompatible) is the beauty within him, his kindness where he will sit 8 hours with a friend dying of MS or help with the computers of his ex-girlfriends.
I’ve seen profiles from men who give their waist size or emphasize that they look younger than their age-what chart are they using ??  ) or men who would give the date when they took their picture. Yes, we are at an age that we ARE aging BUT it’s not like we’re under 10 where one will really change in one year, at this age, one doesn’t look that much different in 5 years or maybe like me even in 10 years (though to be truthful I HAVE changed in 30 years- !! ) I’ve seen my buddy perusing profiles of women, one who at 59 is attractive enough to still model, (and whose picture is obviously from her portfolio) whose first sentence is “I’m attractive” and another who after chastising men for not looking like their pic, gives her height 5’4” and weight 115 and to prove it, has a whole GALLERY of her anorexic photos  it’s as if the photos which show their obvious physical assets aren’t enough, they need to remind the men.
Why waste time stating the obvious, instead state your passions, show your intellectual ability, where have you traveled, show your sense of decency in your writings or in what has one done to better the world, or if that’s too difficult or profound, your sense of humor, knowledge of cinema, politics, psychology etc and what makes you tick and what about another lifts your libido.
Due to the fact that I had an outdated photo in a previous profile (for those that read this far and were curious about me, you’ve finally been rewarded but this new username is much more apropos to my wordiness, no?), I didn’t get a lot of responses. Though neither fat nor (in most men’s opinion I think) ugly, (always thought that the ONLY reason for testimonials was from the men I DID meet to declare that I did NOT look like Jabba the Hut- men were so scared (or maybe thought that I was as talkative as my writing was prolific) that most men didn’t either write or respond to me. Many that did (though not all, if you’re one who DID meet me and who I'm still friends with, you NEEDN’T put yourself in that category, it was always the OTHER guy (LQTM), tended to lean towards being on the short, overweight, homely, or broke, side (didn’t have to be rich but would like a guy in my age bracket to have enough fiscal ability to at LEAST be middle class) due to my philosophy however, even if the picture wasn’t that attractive, (like me, they may look MUCH better in person:laugh: ) I’d still meet the person, if they had a decent profile. Is it because these kinds of men found it difficult to meet women because of those traits OR are those aforementioned men more courageous, daring, have a sense of humor or smart enough to verbally spar with me. The very few attractive men that I’ve met didn’t seem to be either that interesting, intelligent or funny (perhaps the attractive ones that were, were dating the women with the gallery of photos-!!) I guess that's what's left when you're my age, few years ago, a woman wrote a book on "mansharing", a woman in the talk show audience blasted her for low morality for advocating that, the author replied, "You're in your twenties, just wait until you're in your forties, you're ideals will change."
There IS one man who MAY have had all those aforementioned qualities, had a GREAT profile on an different site as long winded as this, multi lingual, has long eyelashes and piano fingers but told me at my first contact, he was not longer dating, alas) but since he’s still always on that other site was probably just his gracious refusal (at least he had manners which it seems a lot of people on dating sites don‘t.) There were many men who initially contacted me, in my previous life oops, profile and then just couldn’t find the time to meet me (did they email me BEFORE they read the profile, thus confirming my Palovian comment on that other ex-profile?) but it’s seem strange these men that don’t have time to meet but seem to be on dating sites a lot (perhaps if they got off the computer they’d actually MEET someone!) It was also interesting on the previous profile, at the number of illiterate or (dumb??) men who contacted ME FIRST to meet me and then wanted to see a current photo. What pray tell, is difficult to understand about the phrase “don’t have a current pic, so can’t send one?” (FYI, just won a free photograph from Sear Photo Studio, so that’s why I have THIS one-so those that went crazy and were obsessed about my having a current photo on that past profile can FINALLY get a life!)
I went on for a few more paragraphs but as I'll probably be cutoff-so suffice to say that men should know that the most attractive women on here may NOT be the nicest. I had a friend who just blocks men because she’s too lazy to respond saying not interested, (it’s not a good thing as I found out that my profile was deleted in the past on another dating website for too many blocks and since I don’t block assuming it’s others who I contact only once) It’s frustrating that she gets so many emails as the only thing in her profile is a definition of serendipity, (unlike mine which had all the elements above ) so it’s nothing great, but hey she’s got a whole gallery of photos, showcasing her 20 inch waist
So I wish you men (and hopefully some women took the time to read this also) well, and hope that this may give you food for thought as to maybe changing your profile and/or changing your values of the type of person you’re looking for.
Auf Wiedersehen, ciao, au revoir, sayonara, dzai jyan, adios amigos!!
And as for interests and first date info....
It doesn't matter as it's all the pic anyway-right? But.....
considering what I said, probably won't get ANY responses but in my last profile went on and on about how I didn't have current pics and people STILL contacted me asking for one, so knowing what you know, if you still want to meet me and want an enjoyable evening with an attractive and intelligent dining companion I'll meet but NOT for coffee or walks but for a meal (being a kind and generous person I DO have an Entertainment book so it's like going Dutch-LQTM!!). No phone or email chat beforehand, we just set up a date and meet.
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