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| Monday
by evildarkqueen at 11/2/2009 11:01:58 PM
Departure" / "Ride My See-Saw" - The Moody Blues : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wGEye0b5JXw
For a day of so many tangled and mixed emotions. VOTE
Got up early and went to see this attorney who I have never met in person before. He surprised me. He was dressed very casual and was very laid back. We sat there and talked for almost two hours. We touched on subjects that were not related to my case. He asked me if I would go places I didn't really care to go to at all. I am not sure why. Some wounds were opened and I bleed. Certainly was not expecting that. He said it would be nine months to a year before we actually get into court. I guess that is about what I expected. I am patient....
It is said that the "only constant thing in life is change". I guess I keep learning that lesson over and over. I really don't feel like writing about it all today but "Dear Diary" I fear in my heart that the end of a very long relationship is nearing an end. There is no longer room for compromise. The bullets have been fired and the damage is done. Walls have been built and it seems there is no where left to go. I have always lived my life believing that there are always options. I can't see many options left for me and I don't really like it but what is, is what is. I cannot change that. You cannot always change the way you feel just because you want it to change. I really thought at one point that I could. But I can't. Oh the word can't... I should rephrase that.. I don't know how. God knows I have tried and tried. I really need to just turn the page. I am giving this problem away. It is the only sane option that I really have left to do. So it is out of my hands and what will be will be. I am sad.....
I had a really good dinner tonight. I stuffed myself. It was nice to see Stella. It has been a while. Her sister came by with her "friend". He seems like a nice guy but he drinks too much. Charity gets cut loose from JD on Thursday. It will be nice to see her and I pray that she is on the right track now and that Stella's sister becomes the mother that she needs to be. Charity is so beautiful and smart. This could be your big chance girl... don't blow it. Anyhow I can't wait to see her. Stella sent me home with a big care package. She always does. So I will eat Korean food and reek for days but that is ok by me. I had fun....
Food: 1 peanut butter and toast, 2 hi-cal drinks, small piece of carrot cake and as much Korean food as I could shove down my face. I did a good job of it too. lol
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