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Girl in Angst
by luckyme87 at 3/14/2008 4:37:27 PM


Today was a normal day, and by normal I mean completely dull and uneventful. So how do I end such an amazing day?? I sit alone in the dark listening to a cd titled 'EMO' while drinking a tall glass of Kalulah in the same sweats I woke up in. Being alone at night really gives me quality time to think about how bored I am. All Ive had on my mind today are all the things I wish I was and had.

For example.... I've been longing to get out all the creativity and emotion I have pent up inside. I want so badly to be able to sing, the problem with that is I cant sing and have terrible stagefright... I mean I get embarassed singing in the shower or in the privacy of my own home. I'm scared these walls arent very soundproof and the neighbors are looking out their peepholes just waiting for the chance to see the tonedeaf freak disturbing their peace. So I tried a different way to get out my creativity... I used bathtime crayons to draw a masterpiece on my shower walls. Its really coming along considering I draw very poorly.

Problem solved there which brings me to my next hurdle to happiness, I've been longing to be in love with someone who loves me equally if not alittle bit more. I'm having a hard time finding someone totally rad and funny and cute... did I mention cute? Everyone says that when your not looking Mr.Right comes along, but what am I supose to do till then?? Twiddle my thumbs and suffer miserably? I have this way of settling for guys that I'm not that into but are crazy for me; this usually ends badly because I get bored and dump the poor saps. If its not that type of guy its someone that I'm head over heels for who has that sexy "I dont care" attitude, the problem with them is they never really appreiciate me and put me down. I try and change for them and then realize I deserve better and of course dump them. Come to think of it I'm somewhat of a heartbreaker... I've never been dumped. Is this bad karma the cause of my angst and love sickness? Is it possible to find someone really amazing that thinks I hung the moon? I'm beginning to believe all those Jane Austin novels I obsess over are a bunch of rubbish ha ha!

People, I could really use some good vibes sent my way and possibly a 6 ft something adorable music junkie guy!



-Lucky