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| 2 am in Tuscaloosa
by alexandrakey at 4/3/2008 12:27:23 AM
I have been on this freaking site all day long. It's like a new addiction. Why is that? What is it about attention that preoccupies my thoughts?!
I joined a bunch of different dating sites, not really knowing what I wanted yet. This sight has been the best for me so far. I think maybe I've figured out what I want.
A date.
I want a date. Not a one night stand. Not a four year relationship. Not a dog to keep at his house. I want a date. I meet a guy for the first time over coffee at starbucks and we talk. Yes, the question game, the nervous laugh, the awkward silences, the inner-voice insecurities about what they think of you so far, and the risk of what happens when the coffee is gone: So, you wanna get together again? OR It's been fun.... I'll call you... OR the shy grin that says I kinda wanna kiss you but I know it'll be awkward and public and I'll fall, and then the whole thing will be ruined so instead I'll just sit here and stare. (My fave.)
Needless to say, I've never experienced any of this. I just made it all up. But that's what I want.
A date.
If that leads to a second date, cool. If that leads to a series of dates, great. I'm even okay with a long term, short term, or just physical relationship, as long as it all begins with one, innocent, old fashioned date.
If only....
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