| 5/26/2008 9:40:50 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | sircharles60
Wiltshire
United Kingdom
age: 60
| i believe you are right on some things, like she will dump you for a bad boy in a new york second, they want to control the money, they want a bad boy to open the door for them , just to say they conquered him,
but i think its that they really dont know what they want.
They run to their friends for approval, and really cant make a decision on their own. they run in crouds, like chickens.
i laugh when i see post like this, not at you, but with you, what is it really they want. God only knows the truth 
There seems to be a lot of male bonding going on here maybe you have been seeking the wrong gender as you and kerryc seem to be so in tune  
| | 5/26/2008 9:45:37 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | dj7015
Ormond Beach, FL
age: 58
| Kerry - you do have some points but lets not put ALL ladies in the same group. I get the your such a nice guy - BUT. But what - talk to me. I've known some great ladies so i wont give up looking but it can be frustrating for women also.
| | 5/26/2008 9:48:41 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | kerryc
Panama City, FL
age: 36
| Charles, that isn't even WORTH replying to.
| | 5/26/2008 9:48:52 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | 3d_driver
Waterville, ME
age: 24
| Hopefully a woman will correct me if i am wrong here..
Aren't women just like us men regarding the fact that we have a general idea of what we are looking for in the opposite sex, yet at the same time have NO idea at all?
I don't believe that anyone in the dating game knows exactly what they are looking for, or want.
Or that could just be me..
I guess my point is, I don't try to figure out what women want. Why? Because if I am who they want, it works. If you sit there and try to become who she wants you to be, sure, it will work for now. What happens down the road? When who you really are comes out? Are you willing to become what she wants you to be? Willing to change who you have become over the course of your entire life, just to please someone else? I hope not. Doubt that would make either persons in the relationship happy.
But I am single, so I suppose my ideas could be flawed.
| | 5/26/2008 9:56:32 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | 
sun_shine51
Shreveport, LA
age: 57
| This was taken from USA WEEKEND May 16-18, 2008:
What women want
by Dennie Hughes
Q: I'm a 30 year old guy who has started dating again after ending an eight-year that began in college. Times - and women - have changed. What do women really want these days? (D.B., Wisconsin)
A: TO FIND out the answer I explored the most recent relationship research. The Engage.com singles site, for example, indicates that women regard old-fashioned manners as the biggest must-have on a first date; 77.9% want a guy to at least hold the door for them. Pepper Schwartz, a sociology professor at the University of Washington in Seattle, says a guy is likely to make the grade if a woman finds he is of similar intelligence, has a sense of humor and generosity of spirit, and, "even if it's a lame attempt, shows he's trying to be romantic." Psychiatrist Scott Haltzman, author of The Secrets of Happily Married Women says it's all about a guy listening and remembering personal things such as significant dates or food allergies.
Having a sense of humor, being attentive and kind and making her feel like she's the most important person in the world...what a woman wants probably hasn't changed much since your dating days.
What has changed is that women today are less willing to let a guy run the show. Many are financially independent and more apt to value a big heart over a fat wallet. (True.com found that fewer of 10% of its female members list income as a key criterion in the search for a mate.)
The bottom line: Today's women won't settle just to settle down.
I AGREE WITH THIS.. EACH GIVING 100% INTO THE RELATIONSHIP-I WOULD RATHER HAVE A MAN WITH A BIG HEART, A GUY WHO LISTENS, TRIES TO BE ROMANTIC IN HIS OWN WAY, A MAN WHO OPENS THE CAR DOOR, REMEMBERING PERSONAL THINGS, AND IN RETURN I WILL GIVE HIM WHAT HIS WANTS AND NEEDS ARE......
PAT
| | 5/26/2008 9:59:14 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | 
missmmeoftheday
Brooklyn, NY
age: 43
| I agree with you 3d... you can't- nor should you- change who you are to please someone else.
[Edited 5/26/2008 9:59:55 AM]
| | 5/26/2008 10:00:41 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | sircharles60
Wiltshire
United Kingdom
age: 60
| Charles, that isn't even WORTH replying to.
You need to stay cool, I was just joking but you are getting so serious about this subject. When you find someone who wants you as much as you want them, life will be great again.
You sound hurt and angry you just need to stay..................
| | 5/26/2008 10:03:02 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | kerryc
Panama City, FL
age: 36
| My apologies, Charles. When you've been searching & failing for as long as I have, you tend to become hurt, angry, & vicious. I've had it with this nice-guy shit.
[Edited 5/26/2008 10:06:40 AM]
| | 5/26/2008 10:10:57 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | 3d_driver
Waterville, ME
age: 24
| It just upsets me that both men and women are so quick to generalize the opposite sex.
A lot of guys think women are money-hungry control freaks who want nothing more than to change you into who they want you to be.
A lot of women seem to think that all men are cheating, untrustworthy, two-faced pigs.
Why? Has the entire singles crowd really been hurt this bad??
Dont we all just want to be happy?
| | 5/26/2008 10:15:05 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | kerryc
Panama City, FL
age: 36
| 3d, apparently I have. I've been on enough of these damn websites to know. All I want is ONE, not 10...apparently, it's f**king useless!
| | 5/26/2008 10:15:16 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | |
missmmeoftheday
Brooklyn, NY
age: 43
| 3d- I agree with you 100%. We do want to be happy, but first we have to be happy with ourselves. If you cannot be happy with who you are, if you cannot be alone and ok with that, if you are constantly looking for that fix from the opposite sex to complete your world... of course they will all fail miserably. No one can fix our lives; we all have to make our own happiness, and then invite someone else in to share it.
that will be 25 cents, please. 
| | 5/26/2008 10:21:07 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | kerryc
Panama City, FL
age: 36
| Fine, you try being 35 & a GODDAMN virgin! There...it's out...happy?
| | 5/26/2008 10:24:42 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | sweetaz
Mesa, AZ
age: 45
| Hopefully a woman will correct me if i am wrong here..
Aren't women just like us men regarding the fact that we have a general idea of what we are looking for in the opposite sex, yet at the same time have NO idea at all?
I don't believe that anyone in the dating game knows exactly what they are looking for, or want.
Or that could just be me..
I guess my point is, I don't try to figure out what women want. Why? Because if I am who they want, it works. If you sit there and try to become who she wants you to be, sure, it will work for now. What happens down the road? When who you really are comes out? Are you willing to become what she wants you to be? Willing to change who you have become over the course of your entire life, just to please someone else? I hope not. Doubt that would make either persons in the relationship happy.
But I am single, so I suppose my ideas could be flawed. 
| | 5/26/2008 10:25:02 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | 3d_driver
Waterville, ME
age: 24
| Don't get me wrong, I understand COMPLETELY how angry and frustrated you can get after being turned down so many times. It makes for a bitter view of yourself. I was angry for a long time after my last relationship ended and it seemed like I would be alone forever..
I figured, if I cant force the rite woman to com into my life, then I will do the next best thing, and that is build a rather happy, self-sufficient life. But I am not alone. I have my little girl here with me, she isn't even a year old yet. So I am happy being single, and just being with her. I think having her to love has given me a stay on finding a woman to love me.
I understand that it doesnt matter what anyone says on here to you, you are still going to be upset over things in the past, but hey, cant change it, so don't stress over it. Chances are you are happier in your life now than you would be had gotten together with someone that is not compatible.
| | 5/26/2008 10:30:24 AM | Of interest (Warning: long) | | gonesailingbabe
Des Moines, IA
age: 45
| Aren't women just like us men regarding the fact that we have a general idea of what we are looking for in the opposite sex, yet at the same time have NO idea at all?
I don't believe that anyone in the dating game knows exactly what they are looking for, or want.
Or that could just be me..
I guess my point is, I don't try to figure out what women want. Why? Because if I am who they want, it works. If you sit there and try to become who she wants you to be, sure, it will work for now. What happens down the road? When who you really are comes out? Are you willing to become what she wants you to be? Willing to change who you have become over the course of your entire life, just to please someone else? I hope not. Doubt that would make either persons in the relationship happy.
But I am single, so I suppose my ideas could be flawed.
Wow- I think I've found the perfect guy!
Too bad he's the same age as my own son!!!!
Yes!!!! You have NAILED it on the head.
All of it.
Thank you for being an island of sanity in the raging lunacy of DH.
Speaking of raging....venting is entirely acceptable and okay and somewhat understandable. I doubt many people can compassionately consider being 35 and a virgin. Nor would many of them choose that life....
Possibly this has more to do with your rage than why women don't want you...
If women do not choose you, or are not interested in you - you attack and blame all women for this?
That's not only unfair but, will probably do little to bring you the success you're seeking. Outbursts bashing and lumping women on dating sites tends to display more of who you are emotionally than you may wish to show...
I think possibly stepping back from this and looking at it more calmly and less passionately may be in order.
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