tink2
Eufaula, AL
age: 19
| Im having the most boring time ever right now. I need something to laugh about!!!!!
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thepkk
Everton, MO
age: 53
| Cardiologist Funeral
A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. A huge
heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.
Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside.
The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart
forever.
At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes
stared at him, he said, "I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own
funeral. I'm a gynecologist."
The proctologist fainted.
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velvetgloves
Temple, TX
age: 31
| pkk...that's a great joke ...made me laugh at least! I got one I got one!!!!
Ok so There's this couple who's on their Honeymoon. Once they get situated into their Honeymoon Suite, The husband takes his wife into his arms and as their passion heats up she stops him and says "Honey, I need to tell you something. Please be gentle with me, this will be my first time." The husband, in utter disbelief says "What do you mean first time?! I'm your fourth husband!!" The wife responds "Well you see, my first husband, he was a gynecologist. He just liked to look at it. My second was a sex therapist. He just liked to talk about it. My third, he was the best so far. He was a stamp collector."
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53lady
Jacksonville, FL
age: 54
| As with all my jokes...it's all in the telling and you have to see as well as hear them...so how about some limmericks???
There once was a man from McNair...
Who tried to seduce a bear...
But the bear was a brute,
And with one foul swoop,
Left him one nut and some hair!!!
There once was a man from Boston...
Who owned that little car
The Austin... (Austin Healey)
He had room for his ass,
And a gallon of gas,
But his balls hung low
So he lost 'em!
Ok...here's another real joke...
There were two Pollacks hitchhiking on a hilly road. (Sorry Krupa!)
Along comes an open-bed, pickup truck and stops....the driver has stuff all on his front
seat, so he tells them to hop in the back of the pick up, so they do.
As the truck was going down a hill and just coming up to the crest of another hill,
the driver had to swerve real hard to the right to avoid another oncoming vehicle.
As he does, he goes up, then down an embankment into a lake.
He waits for the truck to sink a bit, then opens the door and swims to the shoreline.
Once on shore, he looks around and can't see the two guys anywhere. The driver is scratching his head, wondering where the heck the guys are! He debates for a few minutes then decides to jump back in the water, and look for them. Just then, the two guys pop up at the surface, swim to the bank of the lake, and crawl up onto the dirt, gasping and coughing like crazy!
The driver asks, "What happened.......I was just about to go back in looking for ya?"
While gasping and coughing one of the Pollacks says, "Aaaawwww man ....we couldn't get the tailgate opened!!!!" Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh!!!!
[Edited 9/4/2007 2:19:25 PM]
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tink2
Eufaula, AL
age: 19
| that last one was awesum.
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53lady
Jacksonville, FL
age: 54
| "Tanks" tink2! lol
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