| 9/13/2007 8:36:35 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
harborman
Vallejo, CA
age: 41
| This is an ok dating site but I noticed that there is still a few of you with serious concerns. Anger and paranoia! When you don't get a question or you simply don't understand it some of you lash out like tantraumatic children rather than allowing your brain to pain at solving a problem or understanding alternative viewpoints. Ever wonder why you are single? No one wants someone who is difficult to communicate with. I see many of you communicate well with each other but I really don't see this friendship capable of transitioning into an effective relationship with a mate of your choice. This is what I mean when I say that you're using each other as a crutch to avoid the real problem. Your moral support between each other is good but it is ineffective if not used properly to really help each other. When I suggest that I believe that it is being used improperly I mean that when ever you have thoroughly made up your mind that who ever you've chosen not to agree with you resort to personal attacks with verbal insults and if that doesn't work you take it upon yourself to label that person a Troll or a fake profile. Just a juvenile attempt to rid yourselves of controversial opinions or ideas.
[Edited 9/13/2007 9:18:46 AM]
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| 9/13/2007 8:38:53 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
naughty_or_nice
Weston, PA
age: 20
| WHAT U SPEAK IS SOMEWHAT TRUE BUT YOU DO KNOW SOMEONE IS GUNNA GIVE YOU HELL HUNNY PPL ARE SO DIFFERENT IN EACH WAY U JUST HAVE TO RELAX AND GO WITH THE FLOW SOMETIMES
ANDRIA
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| 9/13/2007 8:45:33 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
lostinwyoming
Evanston, WY
age: 50
| personel attack? nope, just stateing the obvious.nothing personel about it. so why is it your here? still waiting. a troll is someone who goes to chat or forums and try,s to make people feel bad about themselves,mad or sad. thats all i see in your posts. witch may be percieved as an attack on all the members of DH. so in closeing ill ask agin,why are you here?
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| 9/13/2007 8:51:28 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
happy_lady2007
Rumford, ME
age: 46
| everyone has opinions,we don't have to agree to them at all.I try not to attack but I also try to avoid when its so dam complicated.My opinion is your trying to hard to figure this out.and way to concerned for me.Not a attact but a opinion ........
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| 9/13/2007 9:00:02 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
cholo73
Virginia Beach, VA
age: 54
| ....i agree with the thread's point...
...but then again, behind closed doors you can never guess..
[Edited 9/13/2007 9:01:53 AM]
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| 9/13/2007 9:05:11 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
thyme4me
Calumet City, IL
age: 55
| Good Morning. I would like to thank harbor for his concern 4 all of us. I appreciate the time you spend looking at the diff forums and seeing who's commenting and than using that to say we are all co dependent. Thanks for pointing that out. I'm really glad u r trying to bring us to a higher level of conscienceness.
***** AGAIN, I THANK U****
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| 9/13/2007 9:10:26 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
agent05949
Greenville, MI
age: 57
| Paranoia and Anger will inhibit more things in your life then just dating! Good luck with finding your cure.
[Edited 9/13/2007 9:12:31 AM]
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| 9/13/2007 9:10:31 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
repochick
Rosemount, MN
age: 29
| Hey naughty, I love that new pic!!
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| 9/13/2007 9:21:38 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
53lady
Jacksonville, FL
age: 54
| Some ppl are on the defensive because they have been hurt and/or disillusioned at some
point and take that into their next relationshship. Or...they vent here. I said some stupid stuff to one person, awhile back, thought I was joking and in my mind I was, but it got taken the wrong way. This person may have been too overly wary or skittish because of a break up...and is not sure of other people and what they mean when they say things...so it is easier to run away than talk about it openly or rationally.
I'd rather hear about it outright, get it out in the open, deal with it, get past it, then move on. It's like throwing the baby out with the bath water. But some people can't or won't do that...so they will go on to the next, then the next, then the next and never discover what the problem just might be.
I've learned to watch what I say...guess you can never be too careful about that! You just don't know what they've been through so you have to sit back and see what develops I suppose. Some people don't know about forgiveness and letting go of things, and prefer to hold grudges or some like to hold on to anger and nuture and feed it. That will eat you up inside and it soooo unnecessary.
Most of the people here have been hurt in some fashion...it's making plans and having goals and growing as an individual which will get you through the rough times. Some come here to laugh, meet new people make friends, and start over, but you have to rid yourself of old baggage and issues before you can move on and enjoy a new relationship!
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| 9/13/2007 9:22:59 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
klassykitten
Toccoa, GA
age: 50
| Can you say group therapy? And it's free....
Thank you for making a good point. Sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees....But regardless, It's a great support group and I do have the hope to wean myself off of them one day. But until my prince arrives I'll stay with the pack.
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| 9/13/2007 9:28:29 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
harborman
Vallejo, CA
age: 41
| You're smart girls Klassykitten and 53lady!
[Edited 9/13/2007 9:29:48 AM]
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| 9/13/2007 9:43:33 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
nonickname49
Belchertown, MA
age: 58
| Okay harborman, I'll bite...lets go fishing...Your post Paranoia and
Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! Is this a statement
or a question?? I have seen nothing in your post that discusses, nor
substantiates any evidence of paranoia on this site..and if so, you
have yet to show factually how it inhibits happiness in dating.
You continue with a repeat of your last posting about insufficiency.
You state no wants someone difficult to communicate implying that we
all are difficult, then you contradict yourself with a statement, some of you
communicate well, but you do not see it transitioning to an effective
relationship with someone of our choice. Duh, if we communicate well as you
say, why would it not transition??? On what facts do you base these assumptions,
what right do you have to make assumptions, are you psychic where you know
what transpires between say me for example and someone I am communicating with.
The support system that is provided here....is not relative to some of the forum
postings, where there may be differences, and some fighting or nit picking. There
are some mean people who also have an agenda to just be nasty. NOTHING TO DO WITH
the Support system. In one breath you say its GOOD, then You say its ineffective,
which is it?? Where is the data, proof. In a family, a large family, there will be
times of anger, times of content, mixed emotions, bickering, and love and support
The people on this site, their ability to communicate privately, and to establish
a meaningful (your words INEFFECTIVE) relationship is 1. Unmeasurable you and
anyone else have no means of knowing, 2. ITS NON OF YOUR BUSINESS.
The only Paranoia I see is within you, it bothers you that there is a sense of family
here a sense of Community, and you are paranoid that you may not be part of it. Or
pehaps I am wrong in making an ASSUMPTION, it may simply be that you are ANGRY, because
you were in a situation where communication was INEFFECTIVE, AND THERE WAS NO TRANSITION
TO A MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIP, Just my opinion based on what you present.
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| 9/13/2007 9:46:07 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
gawd
Appleton, WI
age: 53
| Klassy can I join your group therapy group? LOL
Right on again Agent!
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| 9/13/2007 10:57:52 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
harborman
Vallejo, CA
age: 41
| Okay harborman, I'll bite...lets go fishing...Your post Paranoia and
Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! Is this a statement
or a question?? I have seen nothing in your post that discusses, nor
substantiates any evidence of paranoia on this site..and if so, you
have yet to show factually how it inhibits happiness in dating.
Sir! Do your homework! It may take you some time as it did me and you'll find what it is your're looking for. But it is here in this vast archive of threads!
You continue with a repeat of your last posting about insufficiency.
You state no wants someone difficult to communicate implying that we
all are difficult, then you contradict yourself with a statement, some of you
communicate well, but you do not see it transitioning to an effective
relationship with someone of our choice. Duh, if we communicate well as you
say, why would it not transition??? On what facts do you base these assumptions,
what right do you have to make assumptions, are you psychic where you know
what transpires between say me for example and someone I am communicating with.
It is not a contradiction! You just do not understand that I've observed that it lacks chance of transitioning! You're looking only from the inside out and not outside in. Try an ounce of peripheral perspective! Trust me! It works!
The support system that is provided here....is not relative to some of the forum
postings, where there may be differences, and some fighting or nit picking. There
are some mean people who also have an agenda to just be nasty. NOTHING TO DO WITH
the Support system. In one breath you say its GOOD, then You say its ineffective,
which is it?? Where is the data, proof. In a family, a large family, there will be
times of anger, times of content, mixed emotions, bickering, and love and support
Who's support system? Mine,yours, theirs, ours! And please do observe that you've acknowledged that there IS a "SUPPORT SYSTEM"! Hmmmmm..........
The people on this site, their ability to communicate privately, and to establish
a meaningful (your words INEFFECTIVE) relationship is 1. Unmeasurable you and
anyone else have no means of knowing, 2. ITS NON OF YOUR BUSINESS.
You've acknowledged my assertion that the transitioning to other more meaningful relations outside of your "SUPPORT SYSTEM" is prohibitive! By saying: "ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS", you close the doors to other viewpoints. You're ok with discussing it with your "SUPPORT SYSTEM MEMBERS" but are reluctant to extend an explanation to me! An outsider! Therein lies your distinction! You don't have the power to do that unless of course you prefer isolation and reclusiveness!
The only Paranoia I see is within you, it bothers you that there is a sense of family
here a sense of Community, and you are paranoid that you may not be part of it. Or
pehaps I am wrong in making an ASSUMPTION, it may simply be that you are ANGRY, because
you were in a situation where communication was INEFFECTIVE, AND THERE WAS NO TRANSITION
TO A MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIP, Just my opinion based on what you present.
The paranoia you seek is within this thread and others as well. Those who seem to suggest that if the thread or OP is much too controversial or combative the rendering is that the OP is a "TROLL or has a fictitious profile. Not my words! Never said it and never intend to! Its beneath me!
[Edited 9/13/2007 11:16:53 AM]
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| 9/13/2007 11:09:21 AM | Paranoia and Anger and how it will inhibit happiness in dating! | |
lostinwyoming
Evanston, WY
age: 50
| and ill ask agin.why is it your here?
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