| 11/19/2007 9:41:23 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
lattml
Hazleton, PA
age: 41
| Hi all:
Looking for a little advice here – especially from you ladies. I’ve known this great girl for a long time (almost four years), and we’d gotten sort of close, but I never told her how I felt about her until about six weeks ago. When I did, she told me I was too late – she’d already gotten involved with someone a few months prior. But she said that had I said something earlier, she’d be with me. And she said all kinds of beautiful things about me; that she cared about me, et al. I tried to change her mind and get her to end it with him; even went as far as sending her flowers at work. They were a big hit, but nothing changed. I haven’t talked to her in a month. As far as I know, she’s still with him; it appears it might be something close to serious. The last thing she said to me was, “you’re so kind and generous, you’re too good for words.” I was thinking of dropping an e-mail just to say hi. What do you think?
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| 11/19/2007 9:44:25 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
emt854
Appleton, WI
age: 53
| She is not interested, time to move on.
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| 11/19/2007 9:46:20 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
tinabug
Wilmington, NC
age: 27
| What do you have to lose by sending her an email? Honestly? I don't think anything. I do have one question though,if you two were close, how could you not have known she was involved with someone else? If she was hiding it from you, then was she really worth it? Just putting it out there.
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| 11/19/2007 10:39:25 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
sumbeach763
Raeford, NC
age: 45
| Move on , you will sit by and she is the one living life......Go forth and live yours...JMO Beach
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| 11/20/2007 5:23:37 AM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
southernsmiles
Cannelton, IN
age: 47
| didnt you say this gal was pretty young in a past thread?????????
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| 11/20/2007 7:11:23 AM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
jazzygirlok
Tulsa, OK
age: 44
| Time to look at it for what it is...she was letting you go easy...yeah, it sucks, but don't give her anymore of you're energy..move on and find someone who does want to be with you..don't send her an email or anything else, just let her go,if its meant to be,she will be back..
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| 11/20/2007 7:15:01 AM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
evie58
Port Arthur, TX
age: 50
| dont sit by the phone I did that once it never rang
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| 11/20/2007 7:19:47 AM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
dg1260
Galion, OH
age: 47
| Dude, she may be sayin nice things, but she is keeping her distance. Your only torturing yourself and you need to put a stake through it.
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| 11/20/2007 7:28:30 AM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
yellowroom
Grand Island, NE
age: 47
| Yep I agree, you laid it out there, and now the next move should be her's....sorry you have to go through this. As they say "timinig is everything".
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| 11/20/2007 1:03:31 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
mom1st
York, SC
age: 31
| just my opinion, but if you truly care for her and her friendship, you would leave it alone. I do not feel that it is right to put her in that situation. It is disrespctful and could be hurting her, because she does value you, and you will only make her uncomfortable. I see no reason why you can't be a good friend, email and talk with her, as long as you do not cross those boundries.
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| 11/20/2007 1:10:07 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
me4aminute
Rutland, IA
age: 35
| I think that every relationship needs to run its course..........if it isn't ment to be with him and she means what she says she will come back to you. By interfering you could cause her to lose something that could mean everything to her. Interfering in a relationship is a big gamble and someone always loses. JMO
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| 11/20/2007 9:20:20 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
lattml
Hazleton, PA
age: 41
| Hi All:
First of all, I really appreciate all your responses, and the honesty and forthrightness of them. In response to the questions, I don’t have an answer for tinabug, and yes, southernsmiles, I did briefly mention her in another post, and yes, she is a lot younger than I – she’s 26. That’s a big reason I let things go so long. But in particular, the responses from mom1st and me4aminute really got to me. Thank you both very much. I hear what you’re saying and I will do nothing. And I won’t bring this up again. But once again, thank all of you who responded. I knew I liked this site!!
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| 11/22/2007 6:21:16 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
chopperbabe
Overland Park, KS
age: 47
| Obviously she wasn't interested if she needed to find someone else so time to move on. You can't change people, can only change yourself. You wouldn't want someone to change you so why go through the trouble of trying to change someone. All that work for nothing. 
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| 11/22/2007 6:28:22 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
heatherhoney
Middlesboro, KY
age: 51
| Reminds me of this song....
I can't make you love me~~~ Bonnie Raitt
Turn down the lights, turn down the bed
Turn down these voices inside my head
Lay down with me, tell me no lies
Just hold me close, dont patronize - dont patronize me
Chorus: cause I cant make you love me if you dont
You cant make your heart feel something it wont
Here in the dark, in these lonely hours
I will lay down my heart and Ill feel the power
But you wont, no you wont
cause I cant make you love me, if you dont
Ill close my eyes, then I wont see
The love you dont feel when youre holding me
Morning will come and Ill do whats right
Just give me till then to give up this fight
And I will give up this fight
Chorus: cause I cant make you love me if you dont
You cant make your heart feel something it wont
Here in the dark, in these lonely hours
I will lay down my heart and Ill feel the power
But you wont, no you wont
cause I cant make you love me, if you dont
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| 11/22/2007 6:35:18 PM | Looking for advice; especially from the ladies | |
kittyj77
College Station, TX
age: 29 online now!
| Wow, Heatherhoney, what a coincidence. I had just watched this movie early in the morning called,"DUETS" that had that very same song. Now the song is in my head.
To answer your question, sir,
You really must move on, there's no use dwellin' over something that's not there.
[Edited 11/22/2007 6:35:54 PM]
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