| 7/1/2009 12:51:58 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | | dancer2010
Bentonville, AR
age: 59
| First of February 2009, I went on line and was approached a week later by a man who lives locally. After reading his profile, and visited on the phone, we agreed to meet for dinner.
When we met, he was not that attractive and over weight, and limped! But seemed to have a great personality. When he first saw me he said “Wow”!
We laughed and had a great time. It was easy!
We continued to date each other for 4 ½ months. In the beginning and thru out our relationship, he said such wonderful things to me, such as
“ Are you my sweetheart” or
“ you look so beautiful”,
“ I love the way you dress”..”I am so proud to be seen with you, makes me so proud when I take you out”,
“ your hair and eyes are so beautiful”, “you are fun to be around”.
He even told me now that I have you, how am I gonna keep you!
Was I ever so naïve!
Our relationship started blossoming…I thought…..had so much fun! I truly enjoyed his companionship! He was so attentive to me! He would call me everyday! I loved it!
We only spent one weekend together, one Friday nght date. And spent one Sunday afternoon together in 4 ½ months.
We would go out on dates only thru the week..either he would take me out to dinner or I would cook dinner in for him several times and send the left overs home with him.
I have even paid for a couple of our dinners, just to show him I was not a gold digger! I did not mind to pay for dinner! No big deal for me!
Then he planned another weekend with me, 2 weeks before…and on Monday before the weekend, he said “I will see you Friday night”.
But on Thursday, I called him and said let’s do something tonight and he agreed. We had a great time as usual.
But on Friday, he would not answer his cell#. He called me on Sat morning and was at his Lake House supposedly! I was upset with him, because he had made plans to take me to the Lake House at Roaring River for the weekend and also wanted to take me to a special restaurant in Eureka Springs because I was so special and I was at the top of his list. When I asked him about how did I miss the communication on the week end, his tone changed, he suggested that we needed some time apart from each other. A week goes by and then he tells me he is non committable…
WOW. This is his profile….Does this profile look like he is non committable?
Looking for my sweetheart!!!!!
I'm a hard working man who enjoys the company of a lovely woman.
Would love to meet someone who would like to share my life with me.
I love being a Gandpa,going camping,boating,traveling and spending c….Fayetteville,AR
My heart was broken!
Red Flags started popping up. Guess they had been popping up all along, but did not want to believe it!
I feel like he is either married or has another steady relationship. Or who even knows!
I could tell he was on the dating web sites every day, I would always look. He told me the web sites Lie. LOL…the sites always shows “on line today” or “ on line yesterday” or even last week. But he said those are LIES…he had not been on for a week…yeah right!
I have never been with him on a holiday..Not Valentines(no flowers), Easter, Memorial, nor 4th of July. Supposedly he is at his daughters or with his son.
Really never gave this much thought about being absent on holidays since I am a real family person!
Our last conversation was when I ended it. He told me he spent a Lot Of Money on me! Only money he spent on me was dinner! I was shocked he would even say that to me. His true colors came out!
Is this what one would call a seasoned dater…I hear some of the men knows exactly how to play women…well, I guess so, I feel like a victim of the internet dating now! I hope you Ladies beware of men like this! This was my first relationship since my divorce…it broke my heart!
Below was the last time he heard from me by email:
I have been hurt!
Friday, I called and humbled myself to you, that I wanted more of you.
You already know my true feelings that I have shared with you.
We have continued to talk for many days and I still feel hurt.
I do not feel I have received any compassion from you.
I will not allow myself to be made to feel unworthy of your presence anymore!
I deserve a relationship that is fun, playful, easy on the mind and also committable.
Which I thought was the kind of relationship we shared.
You know, like the one you described in your profile.
After carefully deliberating our friendship, I have made a decision to move on!
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| 7/1/2009 2:07:01 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
jennyann71
Clarksville, AR
age: 69
| So sorry that you were hurt. But it happens to the best of us , and the ""red flaggs are a sure sign we best not go there, BUT:
You deserve much better and I am sure you will find a man that WILL appreciate all your kindness and willing to meet him half way...Good Luck and God Bless.
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| 7/1/2009 4:03:27 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
dragonldy64
Harrison, AR
age: 45
| I'm sorry that this happened to you...it happened to me recently, but I didn't meet the guy on the internet. You can meet them ANYWHERE! They are emotionally unavailable. And it doesn't matter how much we, as women, think we can change them...until they decide to change themselves...it's best to move on. I hope that you find a good man...there are so few left!
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| 7/1/2009 11:59:33 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
katrinasq
Fort Smith, AR
age: 40 online now!
| Hon, I'm sorry you got burned. I think that first relationship that ends after a divorce hurts more because you are so hopeful after going through the divorce, it's good to have those feelings again and know you can evoke them in others, etc. It's like you get a double whammy of rejection and pain. It does get easier.
Spend some time reading in the regular forums. I have gotten quite the education in there. Dating is vastly different in this information age than ever before. Educate yourself, take some time to heal,and get back out here when you are ready.
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| 7/2/2009 12:32:27 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
jhanging
Clarksville, AR
age: 49
| Just move on. try to remember all the good things, that you did and that he did. Learn from all the bad things, that he did and that you did. And last but not least remember. Who is the most important person in the room. (YOU ARE!!)
PS except when Im their. hahaha 
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| 7/2/2009 12:40:44 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
jhanging
Clarksville, AR
age: 49
| Oh and I forgot. (Stop!) Watching Dr. Phil He is not a doctor of anything but B.S.
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| 7/2/2009 3:24:33 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
arkansasgem1
Plainview, AR
age: 50
| Sorry that happened to you.  Best wishes.. and BIG hug
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| 7/3/2009 6:52:41 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
cinnimini
Bentonville, AR
age: 40
| I'm sorry that happened to you. What a jerk. He will get what he deserves one day.
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| 7/3/2009 8:26:48 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
sultrysuzy
Oil Trough, AR
age: 47
| I know just how you feel. I still have a broken heart. I had my first internet date back in October, this man wrote me from a dating site, he didn't have a pic, I told him I dont usually communicate with someone if they dont have a pic, so he sent me a picture of him to my cell phone. He was good looking, I was immediately attracted, we started communicating alot, every day by phone, email, IM, talked on the phone for hours.this went on for over 6 months. he had a great sense of humor made me laugh all the time,I fell for him big time, we had several dates, he came to my house, we had great times, he even said he always had good time with me, we got along, had things in common, sex was good,etc. I think he is one of those seasonal daters also. now all of a sudden he will not answer the phone, he wont reply on a text message. He hurt me very bad....I learned a big lesson, never tell a man how you feel about them, that was my mistake I guess. So victim of my first internet relationship I totally Understand how you feel.
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| 7/3/2009 9:11:31 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
cinnimini
Bentonville, AR
age: 40
| Yikes. You guys are scaring me. But these are the stories I hear about any relationships. Not just internet ones. I really don't want to deal with all this crap anymore. I was married for 19 years. Then I was divorced. That is almost looking better than the dating scene right now.
I wish anyone who reads this the best of luck in finding love, if that's what you are looking for. Let's all be nice to each other and respect each other's feelings.
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| 7/4/2009 11:47:22 AM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
lrocklady59
Little Rock, AR
age: 60
| hang in there.We have all been thru it and no matter how old they still love to play the game(so do women)just move on. It is tough but remember you got to kiss a few toads before you get the prince!!!
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| 7/4/2009 9:38:53 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
bob1555
Lonoke, AR
age: 53
| He didn't know what he had. Shame.
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| 7/8/2009 7:59:10 AM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
klutterbuck
Bono, AR
age: 63
| Ladies, here is a secret from the "MANS DATING HANDBOOK", page 1, chapter 1.
"The best way to fight with a woman is with your hat. GRAB IT AND RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Now you know. Sorry to let the secret out guys, but the ladies deserve better than that.
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| 7/8/2009 9:58:53 AM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
experimentality
Ozark, AR
age: 36
| I met a woman on this site. MAN, did we hit it off. We had alot in common, talked easily and very often. Exchanged funny little e-mails and texts. We both didn't have a pic on here and for the same reasons. We wanted to talk and see how it would go that way. Went great. Finally we exchanged pics after two weeks. Well.....She wasn't quite what I had in mind, but...I really liked her and it was no big deal. I liked her for personality. AND right after we started talking regularly, I deleted my profile. I think it's only right. What to do? Keep looking for someone better than the one you may have who seems fantastic and everything seems to be going good? That's shallow on many different levels. Not the person I can have faith or trust in. She finally decided that she was too good for me, not in so many words, but the gist of it was there. Glad I found out just how high her horse sits before I got too involved! She said my life is kinda complicated right now. HA! I keep it simple people! It wasn't my loss at all. I know where the grass is green. But still, the long and short of it is that rejection still hurts...
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| 7/9/2009 5:37:23 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
arkigirl
Sherwood, AR
age: 51
| sorry you got hurt i know it was horrible for you especially after going through the hurt of a divorce but this could of happened even if you hadnt met him on internet men and women both are like that not all of them but my advise would be to enjoy your life take your time meet more than one as friends and time will tell which person is right for you dont play games just be honest and up front and take it slow you will find someone who truly ado res you and in the mean time make a slew of new friends by reading alot of these post there is a lot of nice people on here that will make good friends good luck and God bless
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| 7/10/2009 11:38:19 AM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
helikestowatch
Little Rock, AR
age: 39
| So things didn't work out, no sense in taking it personal or being bitter about it.
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| 7/10/2009 5:28:09 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
mommaz78
Los Angeles, CA
age: 22
| Oh and I forgot. (Stop!) Watching Dr. Phil He is not a doctor of anything but B.S. and bull crap
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| 7/10/2009 8:41:08 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
jbck
Springdale, AR
age: 54
| and bull crap
I absolutely agree. We need to stop thinking of television as being correct. They are just as stupid as the rest of us. In many cases, more so.
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| 7/13/2009 6:27:41 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
lakeside54321
Rose Bud, AR
age: 47
| I'll tell you something that everyone needs to hear. It sounds so simple, but it is so true....Dating is the DISCOVERY process. I have dated a few ladies, and the first thing I know...they are falling head over hills "in love", and I'm still just beginning to learn the small details. I've had 2 who were ready to move in with me after 3 or 4 dates. Have people lost their minds? I've had a couple who thought they should own me, my thoughts, and everything else about me after 6 weeks. B.S. If a guy or girl "breaks your heart after 6 or 7 weeks...the problem is not just him or her!
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| 7/13/2009 8:11:20 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
cinnimini
Bentonville, AR
age: 40
| I'll tell you something that everyone needs to hear. It sounds so simple, but it is so true....Dating is the DISCOVERY process. I have dated a few ladies, and the first thing I know...they are falling head over hills "in love", and I'm still just beginning to learn the small details. I've had 2 who were ready to move in with me after 3 or 4 dates. Have people lost their minds? I've had a couple who thought they should own me, my thoughts, and everything else about me after 6 weeks. B.S. If a guy or girl "breaks your heart after 6 or 7 weeks...the problem is not just him or her!
Lakeside, you have a point. I have had the same problems but with men. I have liked someone until he started talking about my moving in with him or talking about marriage within the first two weeks of dating. I had to say Whoa! and put the brakes on.
I have corresponded with someone for weeks only to find when I met him that there was no chemistry. It has happened on both sides. I have been the rejecter and the rejectee. It happens. It is disappointing but finding the right mate takes time and energy. We have to set our minds to that.
I actually believe that you should not correspond more than a week or two before you meet. Why waste all that time and find out there is no chemistry? Everyone has a different belief on that. I'm just sayin...
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| 7/15/2009 9:50:24 AM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
helikestowatch
Little Rock, AR
age: 39
| Maybe that's why the two of you are still single, your obviously VERY judgemental of other people and their thoughts and feelings.
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. A. Einstein
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| 7/15/2009 9:59:04 AM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
ok1954
Okmulgee, OK
age: 55
| I gotta agree with lakeside. Slow down. Enjoy the date. JMO
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| 7/25/2009 8:47:23 PM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
shysenior
Conway, AR
age: 60
| Know how you feel. Just enjoying beginning companionship with person I felt was really great guy. Took me around his friends from start, after couple of weeks of talking nearly daily and two weekend dates, POOF!! No calls, no explaination even online, and we sent messages back and forth all the time. I was not pressuring him, kept dates very respectable, just enjoy time together. Not interested in quick romance, but friendship, then see where it would take us. Would have loved honest reason for it. I will not call him to find out, as I dont think that is my place.
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| 8/13/2009 10:59:00 AM | Victim of my First Internet Relationship | |
helikestowatch
Little Rock, AR
age: 39
| Since I obviously wasn't clear, I will be:
I'll tell you something that everyone needs to hear. It sounds so simple, but it is so true....Dating is the DISCOVERY process. I have dated a few ladies, and the first thing I know...they are falling head over hills "in love", and I'm still just beginning to learn the small details.
Love is an emotion, details are for mico management, the two are completely unrelated.
Your being too judgemental, most people don't need details to love someone and all you have done is pushed love away from you.
I've had 2 who were ready to move in with me after 3 or 4 dates.
Apprently they were more serious about love and relationships than you are, hardly a crime.
Have people lost their minds?
I know of at least one, there's this one guy on an Internet dating site that complains about women failing in love with him and wonders why he's single.
I've had a couple who thought they should own me, my thoughts, and everything else about me after 6 weeks. B.S.
I wont ask.
[
If a guy or girl "breaks your heart after 6 or 7 weeks...the problem is not just him or her!
That's only the case when you have not been completely honest and open, otherwise, yes it's all their fault.
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