| 1/5/2008 7:56:14 PM | what should i do | |
here408357
Kokomo, IN
age: 28
| my wife of five years is 23 years old and tonight she is still my wife yet on a overnight date with a 45 year old man i love my wife i realy do i want to keep our family together but how much can i take i wonder if tonight will get this out of her system im trying to give her her freedom beacause we married so young but i have a heart too
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| 1/5/2008 8:09:58 PM | what should i do | |
spiritwonder
Lions Head, ON
age: 60
| You need to decide if this is the life you want to live. Obviously, she didn't do much dating before marriage. Do you have children? If so, you need to think about them too. This didn't happen over night. There had to be leading indicators. You cannot allow her back into your life until she can make a decision of commitment to either resolve your relationship issues, or dissolve. As harsh as that is, she needs to be accountable for her actions and responsible for her decisions. You too, need to be accountable and responsible for your part in this relationship. Seek counselling and legal advice. You can only change you and what you stand for. Your values are being undermined and you are allowing it to continue.
I just had a similar situation. My love for her was undying, however, I don't want to be around someone who doesn't want to be around me, no matter how much it hurts.
Best of luck!
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| 1/5/2008 8:25:12 PM | what should i do | |
forestrose
Calgary, AB
age: 55
| What is she going to get out of her system? The whoring? Emotionally and psychologically abusing you? The search for who she is, that she seems to think lies in men's penises? If she still needs to 'date', then she has no business in a committed relationship. What is it in you that you would let someone do this to you? Find someone else, even if right now you think you won't (because your self esteem is being severely undermined). Spend some time alone and determine what kind of person you want to be with, and what kind of relationship you want, and then go out and find it! I don't know who you are, but you deserve better! Why does your profile say you are single, yet you say she is your wife? Is everybody in this scenario confused??
[Edited 1/5/2008 8:28:03 PM]
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| 1/5/2008 8:37:49 PM | what should i do | |
here408357
Kokomo, IN
age: 28
| she is trying to find herself but we have 2 kids and i her love so much i found out thorough a email she was telling somebody that she loved me and him just in difernt ways her frriend replied with does he have a good job does he have a stable life ect..... im so confused i know i should leave but i love her so much i havent been the perfect husband but i have been faithful i just dont know what to do i went to a counsker he told me that it was time for me but i dont want to leave her its not that i want to lose everything ive worked for its i truly love her and ive always been able to depend on her shes always been my rock and shes always making references of me and her in future tense she did just call me and said she wouldnt be coming home but she was safe and she said she still loves me
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| 1/5/2008 8:42:57 PM | what should i do | |
here408357
Kokomo, IN
age: 28
| sorry about the profile i skipped over that part i am i was happily married
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| 1/5/2008 8:48:35 PM | what should i do | |
recluse
Greenville, SC
age: 58
| Here, first of all, she was ahout 18 when you married her. She has to concince you that she feels remorseful and that she wants you, and you only, for the duration.
If she can convince you that she is sincere, you must be able to overlook her promiscuity and accept her anew.
If both of these contingencies cannot be met, you must divorce her.
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| 1/5/2008 8:54:10 PM | what should i do | |
easygoin68
Crawford, NE
age: 39
| been there done that. wound up in a divorce. i couldn't stand the cheating, i filed and got out. with a lot of regrets, at first. i don't want to seem harsh, it sounds like you need to take a stand. what you can accept and what you can't. only you can decide that. to me it looks like swallow your pride, or take control of your life. you didn't force her to play around...she chose, she's accountable for herself. and remember, by birth women 52%, men 48%. i took 2 years to heal, life is less stressful. but, thats me. good luck with whatever you decide.
5
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| 1/5/2008 8:56:19 PM | what should i do | |
ss76
Toledo, OH
age: 32
| Man, I am sorry. You must be going through hell. The facts are she is not being a good wife or mother, and she is being unfaithful. You should file for divorce and throw her out. Spend as much time with your children, friends, and family as you can. Don't be afraid or ashamed to ask for their help and support.
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| 1/5/2008 9:10:16 PM | what should i do | |
here408357
Kokomo, IN
age: 28
| i guess i am in denial every morning i wake up and thnk its a bad dream iam at home working on the houses and shes with another man its eating me up inside i have lots of friends and pleanty of hobbys but i just cant tell them i dont want to drag her name in the mud but thats where shes draggin my heart thank you all for youre advice i really do appreciate it
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| 1/5/2008 9:20:12 PM | what should i do | |
dutchboy4u
Huntington Beach, CA
age: 45
| Dude, It's done, over, finito. You need to quit being a tool... Get rid of her. Divorce her ass. Don't be a door mat. Get a back bone.
If you need to, give her one last chance. Tell her straight out...stop her... Tell her the fooling around ends now. No joKing. Now. If that doesn't work get a divorce.
Personally, I wouldn't give her any chances. You mess around and your out. Finito!
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| 1/5/2008 9:22:35 PM | what should i do | |
forestrose
Calgary, AB
age: 55
| When it hurts more to stay than to leave, you will find a way to look after yourself. You can love someone but you can't always live with them. Sometimes calling it 'living' is a stretch in such a situation. Don't think people don't know what's going on here, my guess is her reputation is mud without your help. Stay in your children's lives whatever the outcome. Under the circumstances, you will probably be/remain the custodial parent. Best of luck to you.
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| 1/5/2008 11:36:13 PM | what should i do | |
jrenea
Vernon, TX
age: 27
| You married her obviously because you love her.. Why did she marry you if she wasnt ready? You dont have to sit back and put your life on hold because she wants freedom.. Give it to her.. Let her go.. You will find someone who loves you and respects you.. She is disrespecting you hardcore right now and you're allowing her to... But then again why are you on here instead of trying to be with your wife??? Maybe you arent giving her the time with you that you once did.. If shes out with another man, she's feeling neglected at home
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| 1/5/2008 11:40:32 PM | what should i do | |
crowdog3
Ponca City, OK
age: 34
| First off she is yer wife...what the f*ck was you thinking by letting her go out?
Dude you really need too be slapped for that one,
and two..if she is satyin out all night with this guy, you deserve what ever happens,
If it was me, I wouldn't of let her go out with another guy, and if she did any way i woul dpack her shit, through it out on the front lawn and change the locks too the house
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| 1/5/2008 11:41:18 PM | what should i do | |
jrenea
Vernon, TX
age: 27
| I agree with the others.. she is disrespcting your children too... They are watching their dad be their mom and their dad while mom is out with another man.. Thats traumatizing... Tell her to make a decision immediately and dont allow this to continue
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| 1/6/2008 11:08:15 AM | what should i do | |
forestrose
Calgary, AB
age: 55
| I have to disagree with jrenea on one point: that someone cheats because of neglect at home.
Not true most of the time. Most people cheat 1. for the thrill 2. to punish or get revenge on their partner
3. because they are too immature to understand you can't have everything you see that looks good
4. they lack the character to make a choice, commitment, and promise to someone, and keep it -
or they just aren't playing fair, esp. to the kids who deserve a stable, healthy and happy home.
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