| 1/6/2008 6:40:18 AM | handling the issue of weight | |
shaynawillow
Noblesville, IN
age: 56
|  When you meet someone whose weight is a real turn-off for any potential romance, how should it be handled w/o hurting feelings? It is disappointing for both parties, just in different ways.
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| 1/6/2008 6:42:06 AM | handling the issue of weight | |
heatherhoney
Middlesboro, KY
age: 51
| If you're not attracted to them because of their weight...just be honest and tell them...there is no attraction. If this is done at the first meeting...it doesn't hurt as bad. JMO
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| 1/6/2008 8:51:44 AM | handling the issue of weight | |
steak_king
Whitmore Lake, MI
age: 51
| I don't know I'd tell them about their weight, just things didn't click. I for one would be really embarresed to have someone tell me I'm overweight.
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| 1/6/2008 8:53:02 AM | handling the issue of weight | |
heatherhoney
Middlesboro, KY
age: 51
| Steak I didnt mean I'd tell em about their weight...I would just tell em there was no attraction...silly boy!!
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| 1/7/2008 10:15:55 AM | handling the issue of weight | |
jusme120
Ishpeming, MI
age: 47
| good question and hard to deal with for me I'm trying to break the habbit of dating bigger woman I was married to them and now I'm trying to go for the thinner type not anerexia haha some meat on their bones I would just let em know sorry this isn't going to work out your not my type !!!
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| 1/10/2008 10:17:26 PM | handling the issue of weight | |
cooltammy45
Eugene, OR
age: 46
| I agree if something is not right for you with the person you meet then just tell them the spark is not there and no feeling will be hurt. If you lead them on and they think they have a chance and then you say no then they really get hurt and that is no fun. Best to tell them up front about how you feel and be gentle and kind and loving. I have twice with the two I met there was no spark and I told them and no feeling hurt. 
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| 1/20/2008 10:40:18 PM | handling the issue of weight | |
dbsuma
Lakewood, OH
age: 40 online now!
| Dunno really.
Looks like you could stand to put on a few pounds yourself, HA HA!
Hey, just give him a little bit anyway, it's probably the only action he's ever gonna get any time soon, look at it as charity work.
Dunno, myself i like a little sumptin sumtin on a girl, not huge, but so she looks healthy, a little something to nibble on. What I think is unattractive are these stick figure women that you can see their bones poking threw their skin, cause they are anorexic or something.
I don't think Skellitor is a big turn on for most guys.
But I guess if they are so huge that you'd have to cut a wall off the side of their house to take them out then that might be too much.
But why bother?
Why bother telling him anything?
Just go on your date, enjoy yourself,
It's not like you have to call him back,
would one night kill ya?
[Edited 1/20/2008 10:40:45 PM]
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| 1/20/2008 11:00:36 PM | handling the issue of weight | |
dionesia
Seattle, WA
age: 52
| I just want to share I have a relative who had put on very much weight. She was hating it and would not consider dating. Someone talked her in to joining a BBW site and am telling you these girls/women get more date offers then they can handle. I have asked all my guy friends if they would prefer someone overweight to someone under weight. They ALL said they may not prefer 300 lbs but like flesh rather then a skeleton. I feel that if you like the person you can move beyond the weight. I think it is so wrong the image the media imposes on young girls to be so thin.
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| 1/21/2008 10:09:41 AM | handling the issue of weight | |
clevekid1
Cleveland, OH
age: 39
| I'm curious if you met the fellow online or if this was just a hypothetical question.
I prefer smaller women, mostly because I'm no hulk hogan myself.
The real issue typically is that either you get a bad description or an old pic.
In either case, I don't date the woman again. Not for the fact of her weight, but because of her dishonesty. If someone shows you a pic of a 130 pound person & shows up at 200+, that's not a great way to start a relationship. If it's plus or minus 10 lbs, that's not a big deal, but someone who lies about such an obvious thing is a person who isn't grounded in reality.
I've called women out(politely)on this fact a few times. I think many times people figure they will tell this tiny little lie & you will get to love their personality and it won't matter. It matters. Whether you are 87 pounds or a big fat fatty, lying is the worse way to start a relationship of trust.
Lastly, people that lie about their weight usually have a bigger problem with it than you do. I'd rather be with a 300 lb confident woman than someone that is 175 and lies about it, showing her lack of confidence and hatred of her own body. We'll never love you 'till you love yourself.
(Sorry, it took me so long to shut up)
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| 1/21/2008 6:57:23 PM | handling the issue of weight | |
plussizebeauty
Gilbert, AZ
age: 41
| mmmmm....with a name like Plus Size Beauty, how can i not respond to this??!!!!! quick answer, if you are not attracted to the person, no matter what the issue, you just say, hey, i'm not feeling any chemistry...but i wish you the best. you can read my profile and see that i'm very honest, everything is exact, ht, wt, current pic, etc. so what you see is what you get!
my issue with the mens profiles is what the heck!!! if you are not 6'3 and are really 5'10, we are going to notice!!!! HELLO!!! i have had a personal ad on for about 7 weeks, and have met 5 guys in person and have talked to i don't know how many...out of the 5 i have met....4 were at LEAST 3 inches shorter than their profile said...hello...i'm 5'10, i'm going to notice!
but then again, you know what they say....height doesn't matter when you are laying down!
just my 2 cents!
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| 1/21/2008 7:15:56 PM | handling the issue of weight | |
cute2u
Abingdon, VA
age: 39
| Psb is so right on... Life is too short believe me if its not there its not there. Weight is an issue and be honest about it. Do it in a classy way not an assy way.
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| 1/24/2008 10:15:58 AM | handling the issue of weight | |
nichirenlady
Anderson, IN
age: 51
| shaynawillow,
That's why I mention it in my profile that I am a queen-sized woman. That way I don't waste my time and the other person's. I have it in my profile that if my weight is an issue, then just pass me right on by! I believe in being honest right from the start. When people read my profile, they see that honesty is a big issue with me.
Deb 
[Edited 1/24/2008 10:19:38 AM]
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| 1/24/2008 2:42:33 PM | handling the issue of weight | |
reptygirl
Manteca, CA
age: 28
| To me if you have really talked to a person, a while and really felt a bondness. Then it shouldn't matter that they are overweight. They shouldn't be any different if they are skinny or large. It should be what is on the inside that counts. But doesn't always happen that way. 
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| 1/24/2008 7:48:29 PM | handling the issue of weight | |
clevekid1
Cleveland, OH
age: 39
| that's the problem many people have. It does matter. If you lie (not that you would) & think some bond is going to make someone fall in love before you meet, it won't happen 99% of the time. If you tell them the truth at the beginning of how you look, the bond can 1st begin. You can't skip the details and hope your personality will come thru. Only the fact that you deceived someone will be apparent.
I'll get off my soap box in a second, but I've been on too many dates in the past where I get no pic or of just a head shot & have been blatently lied to. Now a days, if you can't send me a bunch of pics of ALL of you, I won't meet you. I've heard "I hate camera's" a million times too. To me that just means you hate yourself. I have no problem sending pics of me to people and I know I'm no rock hudson...hey wait wasn't he gay?
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| 1/25/2008 10:44:44 AM | handling the issue of weight | |
collide64
Janesville, WI
age: 43
| Why? Do these pants make me look fat?
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