| 2/1/2008 2:28:56 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 sweetynikki Canyon Country, CA age: 23
| So i'm a pretty nice person nd not the type to hold a grudge....I was with my ex Jimmy for roughly a year....we were friends long before that though.....somehow it went from friends to boyfriend.....but almost at our one year mark i think.....me, jimmy, and his two friends were all hanging out an out to dinner....When my bf went to the bathroom his friends told me they wanted to talk to me....they said i seem like a really nice girl and that i deserve better then him.....they told me he was cheating on me, with who, where she was from, etc....and the story was very plausible....so i confronted him he denied it but i really didn't believe him so i broke it off.
Over a year later he got in contact with me through [blocked site]....i'm not a bitter person so I figured we could be civil enough to be friends...a 2 weeks ago he called me while he was drunk at a party about how he misses me, loves me, never cheated on me etc.... and well when we did talk he did say he missed me and was sorry and everything....but it's very hard to gain my trust after someone breaks it.....so i figured we'll talk and go from there......a few days ago i got a phone call from a # i didn't recognize....he said he wasn't sure who i was but my # was on his phone....he asked me if i knew anyone in the Army and i mentioned my ex's name....he told me he was friends with him and he probably used his phone to call me sometime.... he asked me my name and if i was friends with jimmy....i told him my name and that Jimmy was my ex.....he was like oh you must be that cute blonde girl that has been staying in his barracks this week.....well guess what peeps i'm not blonde by any means or dumb.....i told his friend that it wasn't me and he apologized for the comment and that ended the conversation.
well i emailed jimmy cause his cell is disconnected right now....i told him we can only be friends and never anything more then that....he asked why, i told him one of his friends accidentally told me about some girl you've been with and that im not the kinda girl that plays games and i asked him not to try and play me....i told him i don't trust him and don't want him back. since then he keeps bugging me....any advice? should i hear out his side of the story and be nice,, or should i just completely cut him off....not sure....my friends say i'm too nice and he'll take advantage of that.
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| 2/1/2008 2:38:24 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 markmeunier Timmins, ON age: 41
| You are young and should definitely protect yourself. He seems young and confused also. He never should have called you while under the influence, if he had any real regard he would have called while sober to deal with an issue of such importance. The reason people make calls like this when they are drunk is to have an excuse if things do not go their way. They can always say that they were drunk and were not in full control of their faculties, but they obviously were if they planned to use alcohol as a buffer for their feelings. Just move on and enjoy the life ahead of you. No one should have to wonder about the security of their relationship. Love is a sacred thing and to treat it as less demeans both parties. He may be happy (but I seriously doubt this as well) lying to you and himself as well, but do you deserve that? I think not. Take it as a lesson learned for the future, and just keep the good memories. If grade 11 was the best year of your schooling, do you wish to be perpetually in grade eleven? No, I think not and the same lies true for any situation in life that is not actively growing in the direction you wish best to see your life go. Stay positive and be thankful that his friends were also good enough to be your friends. Best of luck and chin up, things always get better.
Mark
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| 2/1/2008 2:41:02 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 gonesailingbabe Des Moines, IA age: 45
| uhm ok I"ll try to be gentle here....
If he's SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO bad that his best buds ratted him out to you
why are you even asking these questions?
Listen and re-read what you wrote....
if you're little sister said all this to you - what would you tell her to do?
He was drunk when called you? And what you think that brought out his good side? And made him reveal his "real" feelings??????
Go out with one of his friends - they sound nicer! 
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| 2/1/2008 4:00:04 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 bassman1959 Santa Rosa, CA age: 49
| Yep, Listen to Gone. His friends know him better than you do. It's also nice of them to care about you so much. If I were you I would lose the guy.
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| 2/1/2008 4:33:52 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 ge0ge0 Tallahassee, FL age: 41 online now!
| Yea that's a huge "RED FLAG" if his friends warn you about him. Usually buds stick together.
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| 2/1/2008 4:43:22 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 are_we_a_match Huntsville, AL age: 30
| Listen to your heart. If you dont want him then walk away.
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| 2/1/2008 7:37:24 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 pisceslady30 York, PA age: 30
| After all that why would you want to be "friends" . I think friends are people who care about you and aren't trying to hurt you so why bother. He's cheated once and will obviously do it again. You trying to be the better person or be "civil" doesn't help. LET IT GO1
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| 2/1/2008 11:19:42 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 chopperbabe Overland Park, KS age: 47
| Friends don't hurt others and neither should a partner in a relationship. I couldn't be friends, even a tiny bit, to my 2nd X who cheated on me. If I can't trust him in a relationship how can I trust him as a friend???
In his drinking binges I heard all about his past and all the women he was with. His friend's wives, his friends girlfriends, his X's, etc. "Friends" whom he called and yet he having sex with their partners/spouses. No, I don't need that kind of friend. 
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| 2/2/2008 11:53:09 AM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 magtag East York, ON age: 41
| See Gone's post, she nailed it! Reread what you posted and think about what your advice would be if it was your sister, best friend etc. I'm sure you would tell them to run as far and as fast as they could. This guy is NOT relationship material!
There are way too many good guys out there and you have way too much life to live to settle for a cheating jerk!
Good Luck and be strong!
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| 2/2/2008 12:03:32 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 tinasdream Katy, TX age: 31
| go on to a better man before u get stuck having a kid w a jerk
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| 2/5/2008 3:32:27 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 sweetynikki Canyon Country, CA age: 23
| thanks for being honest....i have that problem of being too nice and people can take advantage of it....so thanks alot for the opinions....my decision is to completely cut him off...thanks
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| 2/5/2008 3:59:32 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 4321trucker1234 Niagara Falls, ON age: 43
| you finally got it take their advice
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| 2/5/2008 4:03:15 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 evileddy Ottawa, ON age: 35
| Once a cheater.. always a cheater.
They have crossed that moral line and having been on the other side they are more mathematically prone to continuing such behavior as "well.. I've already done it" kind of
mentality ensues.
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| 2/5/2008 4:11:30 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 craigsheart4u Southington, CT age: 43
| NIKKI; PLEASE READ
well, it seems that 1 is too many times to be cheated on, but 2 times is definetely grounds for ends, but these guys might be trying to break you two up also. people get that way. maybe they see he has a good thing and they don't, they may be jealous. it happened to me in high school with my girl, everyone was out to break us up because we looked so good together some people were jealous. long story, but MAKE SURE HE's GUILTY BEFORE YOU MAKE YOUR FINAL DECISION, also, be careful too, in case it's true. very sensitive situation
alot of guys will tell you, "he's cheating, dump him, i'm a nice guy, get with me" do you understand what i mean? he may not be, and maybe so

[Edited 2/5/2008 4:12:34 PM]
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| 2/5/2008 4:18:48 PM | Cheating Ex Trying to Reconcile | |
 mindyb Park Rapids, MN age: 43
| Nikki,
Aside from the cheating, the betrayal...
How does he make you feel?
Ask yourself this, list all the pros and cons...
if your not sure after that, email me.....I know a little. it's all good girl
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