| 3/1/2008 6:41:22 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
singleagain50
Greenville, SC
age: 50
| I have to side with Katie in that I think you have given way more info than we needed to give our opinion. But, a personal rule that has always worked for me is : If I feel that I need to get someone else to tell me that something is ok, then its probably not! Until you are serious with one of them I don't think its cheating. I personally don't date more than one woman at a time. I don't think its cheating. But I do think its disrespectful. But thats just my personal opinion.
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| 3/1/2008 6:42:32 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
garnetlady
Cincinnati, OH
age: 48
| For myself I talk with many, all are friends unless someone wanted to be more than friends and we both agreed for it to take a romantic turn. At that point I only see/date am romantic with one person. I don't drop my friends though and if I got together with a s/o..my friends become our friends and vice versa. I certainly never lead men on letting several think they are the only one romantically. That is a huge no no.
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| 3/1/2008 6:48:17 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
calypso1158
Everett, WA
age: 50
| The important factor here is that one is clear about this upfront with anyone they are considering dating. Relationships at any level can be frustrating and more so when there are people on dating sites who do not value honesty like that. I know that most men who show interest in me mention my honesty draws them as well as not minding if they see other women. For some people, we are wired to want monogamy as in marriage or in serial dating (only one dating partner and not going on to the next till current relationship ends)
Then the rest of us are wired to be more non monogamous, able to have more than one person in our life at a time, whether it be at the level of friends and dating, to LTRs and lovers at which point it is called polyamory.
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| 3/1/2008 6:59:12 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
oldeschoolcharm
Monroe, WA
age: 47
| Well, I definately want monogamy. And, if I'd reached the romantic stage with anyone, I'd really want the relationship to be exclusive (no other romnantic interest) from that point on to see where it went. But, I've been told that that is unreasonable. Heck, one told me that until she sees the ring, all's fair!
I just don't think that a first meeting with someone when you're not romantic with anyone else is cheating on anybody.
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| 3/1/2008 8:33:11 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
foxy_woman_49
Omaha, NE
age: 50
| oldschool you answered it yourself
I can't tell if there's a romantic spark until I meet someone, though if the sparks fly right off the bat, I likely would not want to meet anyone else beyond that point.
Bravo
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| 3/1/2008 8:35:54 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
zeanah
Clarion, PA
age: 49
| I don't think it is cheating. A first meet is only that. If you become romantically involved with one of them, then you need to be honest before you go in that direction. If she would ask, then just be honest. She has the right to know, so she can decide whether she wants to be involved with someone dating others. Everyone in the mix should be told up front.
I'd want to know...I am not into sloppy seconds! 
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| 3/1/2008 8:47:33 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
oldeschoolcharm
Monroe, WA
age: 47
| I actually misunderstood what my correspondent was upset/uncertain about. We're on the same page in this regard (and in a lot more, too).
This shows how important communication is in a relationship, right from the start.
[Edited 3/1/2008 8:48:17 PM]
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| 3/1/2008 8:51:03 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
oldeschoolcharm
Monroe, WA
age: 47
| Certainly, if the sparks flew right off the bat, I would not care to see someone else in any capacity, except existing old friends as that.
Though, I'd still hold off on physical intimacy for a while -- just the knowledge that the attraction is mutual would have me on cloud nine. And, I'd want to take the time to find out how compatible we'd be emotionally and personality-wise.
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| 3/1/2008 8:58:35 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
foxy_woman_49
Omaha, NE
age: 50
| Thats good oldcharm... Follow your heart and act as you wish. All will or will not fall into place..remain honest and true to yourself gains respect for the type of man you are.
Its you ball game after all you've got your own rules. As long as within those rules causes no harm to another.
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| 3/1/2008 10:56:02 PM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
chopperbabe
Overland Park, KS
age: 47
| Doesn't sound like you are in a committed relationship so you should be free to seek whomever you please. As far a making friends, I have male friends on here and wonderturtle has female friends on here as well. It never crossed my mind that wonderturtle is a player. I have trust that he isn't and he hasn't shown me otherwise. If he makes more female friends while we wait until I can relocate then that is fine. Friendships are great to have and a few that I've gotten close with I've given my personal email addy to continue correspondence with when wonderturtle and I become a "couple". I see nothing wrong with seeking friends - male or female.
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| 3/4/2008 2:25:18 AM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
wonderturtle
Overland Park, KS
age: 42
| WOW..I googled my screen name and saw it was in a convo..so i thought I'd better come check it out LOL ..
I have mostly female friends on my friends list here..maybe 3 of them have my email outside DH..all of them understand that I found my better half in Chopper.
And..the majority of them hardly ever email me...or me them..except to congratulate the other on finding a match ..or to discuss current events. One can never have too many friends..hell, I grew up with little or no friends most of my life.. I think I have more friends online than I have ever had my whole life combined. It's still a little bit of culture shock for me..but I'm easing into the idea that I am likeable and capable of retaining friends even after I have settled down with my partner.
As long as all parties involved know the score, ie) what is really going on..and there are no secrets..then I Do not believe just idly talking to more than one person is cheating.
Do what your conscience tells you is right..and if the other party doesn't see it for what it is..then it is their loss ..and just let it go , move on until you find someone who isnt soo paranoid.
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| 3/4/2008 2:33:12 AM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
hsv_guy_24
New South Wales
Australia
age: 27
| To me cheating is if u involve in sexual activity while ur with some1 but meeting them with both ppl there i think thats ok
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| 3/4/2008 3:42:49 AM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
flowergirl62
South Australia
Australia
age: 46
| I don't think you are doing anything wrong. This site is for chatting to people and hopefully meeting up with the ones that appeal to you. I have met a few on the Australian site and they asked if I had met others and they were doing the same because you are trying find the right person for you.
It is only wrong if you are already involved with someone in my opinion.
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| 3/4/2008 7:23:36 AM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
deannalynnr
Sparrows Point, MD
age: 44
| This is a dating site...we are here to meet and date people to see if they are what we are looking for in life.....I wouldn't call it cheating unless you have committed yourself to one but I will say if you find someone that you really like and can see yourself with this person you better snatch her up because there are way too many men on here for her to wait for you to make up your mind.
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| 3/4/2008 9:24:23 AM | Is this cheating? Just meeting more than one person? | |
oldeschoolcharm
Monroe, WA
age: 47
| Thanks for all the feedback.
Things are working out as they should.
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