| 4/20/2008 11:18:06 PM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
crimson_tide
Fort McMurray, AB
age: 33
| How many other people think they should stop overanalyzing their relationships when in one, and actually enjoy it and go with the flow? When I think about it I realize I have been guilty of it before. Just asking for some feedback, thanks in advance. 
EH, sorry I posted this in the wrong forum unless they moved it
[Edited 4/20/2008 11:32:44 PM]
|
| 4/20/2008 11:37:06 PM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
goodforfun51
Virginia Beach, VA
age: 53
| I think that in many instances, over analyzing a relationship or how things are going with a being causes excessive critical thinking about the being who is the mate to the relationship. This many times causes expectations which are beyond the point where the relationship has grown to, which causes problems.
I have always once finding myself moving towards or within a relationship, stopped the analysis prior to making the commitment decsision and simply enjoying the being and how the relationship grows, to whatever point it grows. So, I guess I vote for go with the flow.
|
| 4/21/2008 1:28:22 AM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
ladyvirtue52
Redding, CA
age: 52
| Yes, I do over analyze...I wish I could let the wall down, but I dont seem to be able to do that. I'm in a situation right now where I find myself doing just that. not really a relationship as yet and I dont know where it is going to go if anywhere. I want to go for it all the way, but Im finding myself holding back...we dont live in the same town, but hes not really that far away either..whats a girl to do..
|
| 4/21/2008 2:25:18 AM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
theironmandan1
Port Saint Lucie, FL
age: 39
| control the things we have power over let fate do the rest, trust, and believe that your your mate is doing the same. positive attitude produces positive results
|
| 4/21/2008 4:53:26 AM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
classicsfan
Charlottetown, PE
age: 51
| Where is the line between analyzing and over-analyzing? If we don't think about how things are going, we start to take our partner for granted and can ignore their needs. If we over-analyze, we can become overly critical of both ourselves and our partners.
Ultimately, I think it comes down to a matter of self-confidence. Over the years, my level of self-confidence has varied and at time when it is low, I tend to over-analyze every aspect of my life, including my relationships. That would include both work and personal relationships.
However successful I am, I don't know, but I always try to be aware of my partner's needs without sacrificing mine.
|
| 4/21/2008 7:29:50 AM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
crimson_tide
Fort McMurray, AB
age: 33
| goodforfun51 that pretty much sums it up. theironmandan1 I really like that advice I'll have to remember that and remind myself of it frequently. I think overanalyzing is a big part of failing relationships. If I put myself in the other person's shoes I can realize that more and more. If I felt like my partner had me under a microscope 24/7 I would really start asking myself whether I'm ever going to be "good enough" for her anyways, and would probably lead to frustration and low self esteem in the relationship.
|
| 4/21/2008 7:38:18 AM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
metu
Mansfield, TX
age: 47
| I tend to unfortunately live in my head & overanalyze almost everything...especially in relationships. From trying to figure out his motives to debating whether he's the "perfect" choice for me to wondering if my a$$ looks too big in this outfit. Wouldn't it be so nice to just breath that comfortable sigh of relief? When that happens for me, I'll know I've found the ONE!
|
| 4/21/2008 7:40:21 AM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
icedsnow63
Broken Arrow, OK
age: 45
| LMAO ME2 i think that is called being female....i do it too....
|
| 4/21/2008 8:03:33 AM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
irresistiblered
Aurora, CO
age: 43
| I think we are talking about a bit more than just a simple habit of being in our own head, sometimes.
I think we all do that, when we are in the presence of someone who is truly a threat (in a positive-negative way) to our independance, and emotional transfiguration.
My take is that a man and woman in a newly budded relationship, do this at a different times. Therefore, it is evidant and felt by the other one, in a big way.
It is the moment when you see yourself leaving "SINGLEHOOD". More so, when you have been single for a while, and have become comfortable in your habits and independance, no matter how badly you want to be with another human being.
Then it comes that wow-moment of Ahhah..."There is another tooth brush next to mine."
I would go as far as saying, it is a natural stage of growth in relationship, when things are not so simple anymore.
|
| 4/22/2008 12:36:52 PM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
dorothy72
Maroa, IL
age: 36
| me i over analyze and it's not worth it cause no matter how you try you will never be able to see into someone's mind
|
| 4/22/2008 1:20:47 PM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
fryyyy
North Kingstown, RI
age: 49
| I think too much of anything might be bad.. but i think you have to be proactive in your relationship.. you have to grow with it.. and try to grow together. I think you should never stop learning. I think you should never stop "thinking" about your relationship. I think you should always be aware of it's status.. and do what you can to keep it a warm and happy thing. I think the worst thing you can do is take your relationship for granted. Next thing you know it's over. and far far far too late to save anything. If my partner is over analyzing in front of me.. i think i simple hug and kiss might apply a satisfactory correction to the problem. But if she walks in and tells me she dosn't love me anymore cus i took shit for granted and didn't see it coming.. then it's over.. too late.. gone..
If i err it will be in the safe direction.
|
| 4/22/2008 1:22:08 PM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
lonesomeloser
Louisville, KY
age: 50
| Most chicks do...great to be single...ya start that crap and I show you the number of ways to exit my crib....
|
| 4/22/2008 1:27:06 PM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
irresistiblered
Aurora, CO
age: 43
| 
Lonesome...my sweet Lonesome...I can see this coming from a mile away.
You will get hit so hard by a knock out of a girl, you won't even know where it come from. Men wo are way too comfortable in their cribs are the first to go.
|
| 4/22/2008 1:34:57 PM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
lonesomeloser
Louisville, KY
age: 50
| Let me say this in english red...IT AINT EVER GONNA HAPPEN.....
|
| 4/22/2008 2:27:54 PM | Overanalyzing Relationships | |
irresistiblered
Aurora, CO
age: 43
|
Okay...I hear you. Don't belive it, but I'll relent...
And this is to all those who are attached to their own independance, so much so, that they are forgoing a partnership:
Do you not want a partner in life who would be your accomplice against all that comes your way...make sweet love to you, when you come home...be there and take care of you, when you're sick...plan fun adventures, when you're well...sit with you and go over all the pictures you guys took from all the cherished moment together...make memories...make loves after the fights...wake up every morning next to you...leaves her sweet smell on your shirt...be there and share your victories...hold you and back you when there are sorrows.
Sit with you 30 years from now, on a twin rocking chair, on the porch, and laugh at you for wanting to give all this up, so long time ago...
Have you really given up?
Maybe we all overanalyze our relationships because we are torn between the picture above, and the picture of the independent life that Lonsome and the rest of us who have been single for a while is so set about.
|