| 4/28/2008 10:18:08 PM | Between 2 People | | debroxylion
Tualatin, OR
age: 53
| It seems like there are those who just do not understand that the bonding of a relationship between 2 people can only grow stronger if they work on it and there should be no time spent on a dating site because that is what it is a "Dating Site". I thought I found someone but unfortunately it appears that he does not want to give up this site and thinks I'm being jealous... but that is far from the truth.... I started falling for him but now my heart feels like jello once again  ....What are your thoughts DH
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| 4/28/2008 10:36:55 PM | Between 2 People | |
dutchboy4u
Huntington Beach, CA
age: 45
| He needs to be enrolled in DH Anonymous.
Guess it's all up to how you feel about it. He won't give it up because he has friends here, orrrr! he's still looking... Keeping his options open...That's not fair to you.
Give him a chance...maybe he will come around once he sees you are really into him.
Maybe he can appease you by putting a blurb on his profile that says he's taken and only here for the friends he has made. He can also go invisible so no one can see his profile. Thing is, if he's serious about you, he should be willing to make some concessions.
If he's not willing to bend, you'll need to put a value on him. Is he worth keeping even though you know he may still be playing the field. Will he ever be into you instead of into this silly site.
Me personally, once I find the girl that I would like to spend time getting to know and date exclusively, I'm out of here! My time will be spent cooing over her instead of clicking on this silly box.
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| 4/28/2008 10:39:06 PM | Between 2 People | |
kgearly1021
Valdosta, GA
age: 48
| Well said Dutch! 
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| 4/28/2008 10:40:39 PM | Between 2 People | |
slappywag
Bac Kan
Viet Nam
age: 88
| There should be no need to stay on here once you have found a person that you are willing to committ to. After all thsi is first and foremost a dating site- correct? jmo
[Edited 4/28/2008 10:41:37 PM]
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| 4/28/2008 10:43:24 PM | Between 2 People | |
classyguy333
West Fargo, ND
age: 57
| I'm thinkin' if I found somebody, I would steer back away from this site. Unless it was a mutual thing together just to see what was going on. I only need one gal.
to the Georgia Peach
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| 4/28/2008 10:51:21 PM | Between 2 People | |
goodforfun51
Virginia Beach, VA
age: 53
| Well it might have lots to do with the status which you possess. Your profile cites that you are separated although for several years. Hence, he might figure that it's no different that you stay ONLY separated and he stay on here, since neither of you can make a legitimate committment due to your marital status.
Why ask for committment when you truely can't deliver the same??
That's my best SWAG (Silly Wild Ass Guess)!  JMO
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| 4/28/2008 11:17:36 PM | Between 2 People | |
fryyyy
North Kingstown, RI
age: 49
| as his wife you'd have every right in my book,
as someone he just met you'd have no right..
somewhere in between is a gradual transition i think.
I wouldn't feel comfortable tho.. if someone was still shopping around while dating me? so i see your perspective. But i think maybe he's made a few friends here.. that he wont lightly abandon.. keep in mind he's dating YOU not them.. so.. it might be a lot to give up on such short notice. but that's only if he's seeing friends in full view of you. if he's still shopping here.. then i don't think he should shop while with you.
at some point you 2 would need to start making decisions about each other, what can you tolerate out of him.. and what will he give up for you? What's really going on (reality) doesn't matter much except to you yourself, cus you know it is a FACT... What matters to your other tho, is what they perceive. Real or not it's what they perceive that will cause the damage. Whether he's actually shopping or not doesn't matter.. what matters is your perception.
soo .. he should change your perception so you feel no threat here
or.. abandon this site out of consideration for you
or .. abandon you if you make it an ultimatum
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| 4/28/2008 11:25:15 PM | Between 2 People | |
sdlove23
San Diego, CA
age: 27
| the only thing he is doing is to see if he can find something better, if he can't then he'll start paying more attention to you, plain and simple.
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| 4/29/2008 5:47:27 AM | Between 2 People | |
ge0ge0
Tallahassee, FL
age: 42 online now!
| Eh, it can go either way. But one thing I do know is that once I find that gal and she and I are physically together this site will be so passe. I literally will not have the time for this site and would want to fill that time with being totally attentive to my mate. She'll know that I'm not looking for something better through act of deed.
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| 4/29/2008 5:51:49 AM | Between 2 People | |
blueyedbobbie
Poultney, VT
age: 37
| i agree there is no reason to continue staying on the site if you found someone that you want to be with. now if you are just at the beginning of chatting and such; it would be no difference if you were meeting and dating people in your personal life.
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| 4/29/2008 5:57:00 AM | Between 2 People | |
justmemaree
Queensland
Australia
age: 46
| Its a hard call really............... if i was with a guy from DH and things were serious, id think id have to state that id stay in contact with the DH website because of all the friends i have made and hope that he would do the same, but there would be stipulations......ie cant go flirting and playing the game, cause i think thats disrespectful..but its all about compromise.............
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| 4/29/2008 6:14:40 AM | Between 2 People | |
yanks118
Moab, UT
age: 25
| i think it depends on how serious the relationship is, and the situation. i like to come on dh to make friends and to read the forums and give my opions, and get the opions of others for diff things. there are a lot of threads on here that just deal in life in general.
it is a matter of trust, and no matter what, if you choose to trust someone you are always putting yourself out there, weather it be good or bad, your going out on a limb and takeing a 50 50 chance that it may break!
if it is something that bothers you, he should respect that, but you both need to keep an open comunication and talk about it...
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| 4/29/2008 6:23:33 AM | Between 2 People | |
brendaj
Savannah, GA
age: 45
| Well I originally came on here to find a man, so I suppose if I ever do, & If things are really serious, he'd be welcome to check it out with me. I'd hate to lose all my friends, but I've said before, they can always come to my yahoo page. It would depend on the man & how he really felt about it. I would put love first though!
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| 4/29/2008 6:33:41 AM | Between 2 People | |
forestrose
Calgary, AB
age: 55
| Justmemaree, I agree. I enjoy being on here, looking or not, and I have been glad that some of the people who have hooked up with someone just put that on their profile, and stay on. Chopperbabe comes to mind - I'm glad she is still here.
Then it becomes a matter of trust. Many people hopefully will be respectful and not come on to someone who has posted they are not looking for dating, but some won't care. Then staying on here becomes a matter of trust.
I figure I would probably stay on here because I like it, unless/until I was living with someone. If I had a man in the house, I would have better things to do than be computing!
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| 4/29/2008 6:37:55 AM | Between 2 People | |
luvwild
Brooklyn, NY
age: 42
| Being separated, even legally separated, is not the same as being divorced.
Until you are both SINGLE you can't be in a serious relationship. This will complicate a divorce - and custody if there are kids.
If you are not divorced and only separated, you shouldn't have expectations of a serious relationship.
Just my 2 cents.
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