gregoryg
Brooklyn, NY
age: 42
| FLORIDA OR THE MOON
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, 'Which do you think is farther away... Florida or the moon?'
The other blonde turns and says 'Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida?????'
CAR TROUBLE
A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.
After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly
She says, 'What's the story?'
He replies, 'Just crap in the carburetor'
She asks, 'How often do I have to do that?'
SPEEDING TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, 'I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!'
RIVER WALK
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. 'Yoo-hoo!' she shouts, 'How can I get to the other side?'
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, 'You ARE on the other side.'
AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
'Impossible!' says the doctor. 'Show me.'
The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed;
Likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.
The doctor said, 'You're not really a redhead, are you?
'Well, no' she said, 'I'm actually a blonde.'
'I thought so,' the doctor said. 'Your finger is broken.'
KNITTING
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, 'PULL OVER!'
'NO!' the blonde yelled back, 'IT'S A SCARF!'
BLONDE ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, 'We were the first in space!'
The American said, 'We were the first on the moon!'
The Blonde said, 'So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!'
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. 'You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!' said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, 'We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!'
IN A VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, 'If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?'
She thought for a time and then asked, 'Is it on or off?'
FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named
Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, 'Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?'
'HELLLOOOOOOO......,' answered the blond. 'They're watch dogs!'
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carolinasweet
Charleston, SC
age: 22
| The jokes are great...being blonde, I can appreaciate them and laugh at myself.
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drumrman
Belmont, MA
age: 43 online now!
| funny stuff! 
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unc005
Seagrove, NC
age: 25 online now!
| VERY funny .
unc
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planejumper73
Milford, MI
age: 35
| Why was the blonde fired from the M & M factory?
She rejected all the candies with "w"s on them.
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twohawks
Bothell, WA
age: 69 online now!
| A redhead, a brunette and a blonde walked into a bar. The bar was very busy, but they found seats. The barman came ovar and asked the redhead what she wanted. "Oh...I'll have a G and T." "Aw c'mon, lady! I'm new here, we're busy and I don't know those codes yet. What do you want?" "I'll have a Gin and Tonic!" He asks the brunette what she wanted. "I'll have a T S!" "Oh c'mon! I just told your friend I don't know the codes yet. What do you want?" "I'll have a Tequila Sunset!" He asks the blonde what she wants. "I'll have a fifteen!" "What the hell is a fifteen?" "Duhhhhh! You know...seven and seven!"
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bikerangel3
Middle Village, NY
age: 54
| 2 Blondes Walked into the Empire State Building
Ask Me Why?????
No idea!!!!! You think 1 of them would have seen it !!!!!
Hi from NYC Bikerangel3
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gregoryg
Brooklyn, NY
age: 42
|
A blonde was driving down the road listening to the radio and was quite upset when she heard blonde joke after blonde joke.
A little way down the road, she saw another blonde out in a field rowing a boat. The blonde stopped her car and angrily jumped out yelling, "You dumb blond bimbo! It's blondes like you that give the rest of us a bad name! If I could swim I'd come out there and give you what's coming to you!"
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polishprincs
New Castle, PA
age: 38
| too cute...
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blondechick37
Industry, PA
age: 37 online now!
| those are funny as hell
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raven622
Fairview Heights, IL
age: 47
| Why did the blonde have lipstick on her steering wheel?
Because she was trying to blow the horn!
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twohawks
Bothell, WA
age: 69 online now!
| A Ventriloquist began his act and immediately launched into blonde jokes. The blonde jokes went for about 5 minutes and a blonde in the audience stood up and said: "Excuse me sir....I am a natural blonde and I have graduated from Yale with a degree in business management. I am the CEO of a very large, world wide company and I take offense about your blonde jokes!" The Ventriloquist said: "I am very sorry madam that my jokes are offending you. I will stop them immediately!" The blonde said: "I am not talking to you sir...I am talking to that little smart ass on your knee!"
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raven622
Fairview Heights, IL
age: 47
| twohawks
|