| 5/7/2008 2:50:22 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
baydreamin
Lancaster, PA
age: 48
| the illustrious ranks of those who have been had/played/scammed! Whatever you want to call it. I had been thinking to myself as I read other people's bad luck/horror stories, that I've been pretty lucky so far....well I guess my luck ran out. Never had a clue. He wasn't off somewhere building bridges, or from another country. He said all the right things - didn't lay it on too thick, nor too thin. He was a gentleman and seemed genuine. He did want to go slow - that's why I was moaning on another thread about endless convos online or on the phone. He simply said he'd had a bad experience and wanted to take it slow. Well he deleted his Yahoo account last week and that hurt! I figured I just pushed too hard - patience is not one of my strong points. He was the one that got away....until Monday when I found an email from him. Apologizing. Said he panicked. Did some serious soul searching over the weekend. Wanted to start over. Everyone makes mistakes sometimes and I really liked him. Took it slow and easy this time...deleted his new Yahoo account again today. So now I'm p-ssed!  (and hurt). Why did it have to be the one I really liked? 
So here's the question: How do you start over again? How do you trust the next person when you were so taken by the player? Unfortunately, I'm pretty gullible. I operate from a place of honesty and trust and I assume that others do too. I hate to be a suspicious person. And I don't want to punish someone for the idiocy of someone else.
Any advice?
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| 5/7/2008 2:58:07 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
evileddy
Ottawa, ON
age: 35
| *takes notes for future experiments*
MWAHAHHAHAAHAHAHA
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| 5/7/2008 2:58:23 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
schriee
Seguin, TX
age: 30
| u start over the same way u started. and just say f---k the dumd shit1
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| 5/7/2008 3:04:58 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
sweetbabeblues
Hannibal, MO
age: 52
| Forgive the past, but never forget it......
And remember to judge the future as if it were your first time.....
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| 5/7/2008 3:07:39 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
collegekidunot
Winnsboro, LA
age: 48
| welcome and good luck! 
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| 5/7/2008 3:27:43 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
defiantlyltr
Stroudsburg, PA
age: 46
| Welcome to my world! 
You stop the brooding, you stop the questioning (I know it's harder than anything!)
you stop the blaming yourself. You pick up the pieces of your shattered heart and
start to crazy glue them back together. With one compliment to yourself here and one
respectful action for yourself there, you give yourself the solice you need right now to move forward.
Allowing yourself to love again is NOT a mistake or folly but a GIFT!!
Know that one day you will get it right and find the right man who will APPRECIATE YOU
and ALL you have to offer. In the meantime, realize that you are one hell of a worthy
person of LOVE and take back the self-respect that you deserve!!!
Love yourself and be true to yourself and LOVE will find you!! 
YOU'VE JUST GOTTA LET IT GO AND MOVE ON!!! 
(HaHaHa!!  The other posters obviously DID NOT read your story!!  )
[Edited 5/7/2008 3:29:49 PM]
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| 5/7/2008 3:28:41 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
tfortexas
Big Sandy, TX
age: 56
| Just put that helmet back on get back in the game and go for the end zone on two.
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| 5/7/2008 3:31:48 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
wolfcreekgal
Sheridan, WY
age: 44
| Wow, baydreamin.........My first question to you would be this....How long had you been talking to this guy? I assume you never met him in person based on what your thread says.
I'm equally as gullible so, don't beat yourself up over it. A few years ago I met a man in a chat room who claimed to be a really wealthy Montana rancher. He sent me pictures of his helicopter, his airplane and inside photos of a log home that an Oscar winning actress would have had a shit-fit over.
As our conversings progressed, he also claimed to be some sort of CIA agent and couldn't go into details about it as the info was classified. Even as naive as I am, I smelled a rat. I did some digging and could not find this guy's name in any of the Military registries. I told him of this and he was quick with the reply of: "I told you, what I do is classified."
About three days after he said this the 9/11 disaster occured and I never heard from him again. His screen name disappeared off of AOL and that was the end of that.
In retrospect, I know now this guy was, undoubtedly, some really old man who couldn't get a woman if his life depended on it.
Oh, and BTW, this happened directly after we were scheduled to meet in person......
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| 5/7/2008 3:35:16 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
italianlady05
Omaha, NE
age: 53
| oh bay..i'm sorry..you put yourself out there and he obviously wasn't the right one..but don't kick yourself too hard...at least you tried..and the right one will come along at just the right time..it does suck i know.
Keep smiling, stay busy and hang with us..we'll cheer you up!
hugs
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| 5/7/2008 3:38:20 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
baydreamin
Lancaster, PA
age: 48
| wolfcreek, we hadn't been chatting long, but the chats were meaningful, I thought. Not super deep, but that was good. I had had enough of these crazy, intense email/phone convos where I was practically married to the guy before we even met! I liked it that this guy seemed like a normal guy. No outrageous boasting, no bragging. Just a cool guy who responded to my playfulness and seemed real.
Wish I could look back and see the warning signs....but there really weren't any.
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| 5/7/2008 3:39:11 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
grobs
New Braunfels, TX
age: 38
| Yes its tough,. Take it one day at a time and its okay to be cautious.
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| 5/7/2008 3:41:24 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
ge0ge0
Tallahassee, FL
age: 41 online now!
| So how much money did he ask for?
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| 5/7/2008 3:41:25 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
gonesailingbabe
Des Moines, IA
age: 45
| I don't have the magic answer to how to pick yourself up and start over again, or how to trust when your truster is broke.
I think defiant had the most clear advice of any of the posters so far,
I think the only thing I would add to it would be this, slow all of it down.
Slow EVERYTHING down.
Step back and away more often.
With the weather improving and life is moving toward Summer - look all around you and relax, by the time you begin to feel the season changing again you'll be remembering this "one who mattered" as the one who wasn't all that.
Go more slowly in your moving forward.
I know that's hard to do, but it makes it easier to see the realities.
I also don't see that this was a "scammer" - not in the Nigerian sense of the word. This sounds more like a man with some issues of his own, who can't decide what he is wanting at this time.
Believe me not only men go through that, I have as well....and I still don't know. Maybe I will one day, and maybe I won't.
At this point - what happens, is what happens.
Don't take it all so to heart, or so seriously.
Enjoy the ride and drive slow.
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| 5/7/2008 3:42:57 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
wolfcreekgal
Sheridan, WY
age: 44
| Dang Bay, well, I know it hurts no matter what people say and I feel for you. I'm there if you need to talk about it........
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| 5/7/2008 3:48:30 PM | Hooray for me! I just joined..... | |
baydreamin
Lancaster, PA
age: 48
|  ge0 - No money requested!
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