| 5/12/2008 4:56:43 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
soulcrazy
San Clemente, CA
age: 39
| Awwww... Thanks 1mt. You are a wonderful guy! 
We are determined to make it... a love like ours is rare. It only gets stronger everyday. I use to laugh when I heard people say that but I now know it to be true. Unfortunately, not many people ever experience a love like this. I never thought it existed but it does. So when I say DONT SETTLE... I mean it. The greatest part of loving him is that he loves me just as much back. When you find a love like this you will know it and you will do whatever it takes to keep it...there are no words to really even describe it.
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| 5/12/2008 4:58:14 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
virgomomof1
Brunswick, ME
age: 35
| Mine is 1200 miles away and we met here. For us, failure is not an option. 17 days and a wake up! Can't wait! California here I come.... 4eva!
I wish everyone here the best if they decide to pursue a LDR but speaking from experience, there are some days I just wanted to say screw it and book the first flight to see him. After a little common sense set I would tell myself that its only temporary until I could go to sleep and wake up in his arms everyday for the rest of my life. The distance is the hardest thing I have ever had to endure in my entire life... having said that, it makes us REALLY appreciate every minute we are together. I think you value your relationship even more when you know you have had to overcome so much to be together.
~Cajun~
Great to hear cajun! I am optomistic when it comes to LDR's. I know if there's chemistry, there's always a way for it to work. 
meant to quote cajun....
[Edited 5/12/2008 4:59:18 PM]
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| 5/12/2008 5:05:13 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
soulcrazy
San Clemente, CA
age: 39
| You did quote me Virgomom. My previous profile name was CrazyCajun and his was SoultryNights. We combined our profile when we became a couple so I sign my posts Cajun.
You are right... as long as both people put forth the required effort to make it work it can. It takes serious resolve but to me... love is worth ALL of the strength and determination... especially if it means I get to spend the rest of my life with him together in a loving, and HEALTHY relationship!
[Edited 5/12/2008 5:12:48 PM]
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| 5/12/2008 5:11:21 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
katrina_sq
Mena, AR
age: 39
| I sure hope so. I am talking to someone I met here who lives 150 miles away. I am going to meet him tomorrow, and I have high hopes that he is "the one". Only time will tell. If things do work out, I am planning to relocate there as the area he lives in is somewhere I was already considering moving to anyway for career reasons. I know it will be rough not seeing him very often, but we already talk on the phone every day, and I think we can get by with that for a few months. I do think if you are considering a LDR, you need to discuss early on if one of you is willing to relocate if things work out. If neither is willing, there is no point continuing a relationship that i going nowhere and both will get hurt eventually.
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| 5/12/2008 5:45:21 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
roket
Casa Grande, AZ
age: 51
| Lookin, I read the thread. There are some good questions and some good answers. I will address the upside to answer your question. First you addressed the downside. i won't go over the downside to LDR because it is obvious to all. What could possible be an upside? For myself I have found several reasons.
Initially I didn't put a lot of thought into it. Actually to be honest I kinda blundered into it. But then some of the best things in my life I have blundered into. Age, experience and wisdom now allow me to RECOGNIZE when I blunder into a good thing. I can recall many stories from my 20's when I blundered past a good thing and it took weeks, months sometimes years for me to go, "Wow that was a real positive opportunity fate handed me and I didn't see it".
So I blundered into this. Upon closer examination I have come to several thoughts/realizations. 1. By casting the net wider so to speak one GREATLY iincreases the odds of meeting that one that just fits like the proverbial glove. 2. A long distance relationship requires greater than average communication skills. 3. The person you find that will even think about it tends to be more emotionally mature and not a stranger to the term, "delayed gratification". 4. LD has forced me to get to know her slower and in much more depth than I have in the past with others. The discussions are great and at times a natural drama develops that is entirely natural, intense and not "staged" (although we all know those "drama queens/kings" in both regular life AND online).
Needless to say the ultimate goal though is at sometime to be able to meet and to be in close proximity to the person your involved with. I myself am starting the steps leading to an education that will afford me a great latitude in where I can live. ladyvirtue had very good suggestions that are sound. Communicate with your sweetie. Do it on phone and e-mail and in chat. A very good chat program is Yahoo Messenger. The IM in DH is very clunky and useful only to get to know a person well enough to know whether you want to give them your Yahoo ID to chat there. Send letters via snail mail and scent them with your smell. Exchange current pictures. All these things can help bridge that temporary gap. Use technology to keep each other involved with each others lives on as daily a basis as possible.
These are all general thoughts and suggestions. it is different for every person and every couple. If you want to pursue it you and her will have to "find your own stride" so to speak. I have seen LDR (more than once or twice) turn into real relationships ultimately. I have seen more than four actually result in marriage two of which i lost track of and the other two I am still in contact with both couples and one is hitting a decade and going and the other couple have been married for decades. I have seen them not work too. From what I have seen the success rate is about the same for short distance relationships give or take. Keep in mind online is no different than regular life insofar as people come in here with both realistic expectations of and from relationships AND UNrealistic expectations of and from relationships. It will ultimately be what you both make of it.
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| 5/12/2008 6:19:44 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
barbara1
Reston, VA
age: 51
| They are difficult at best.
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| 5/12/2008 6:23:10 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
msmori
Kansas City, MO
age: 43
| anything over a 1 mile radius from me, just plain "Sucks"
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| 5/13/2008 7:42:14 AM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
unc005
Seagrove, NC
age: 25 online now!
| Ok, up until recent turn of events, I would say that they're doable, I'm open-minded to them, etc.
But..due to the guy I was "involved" with (HA!      ), my (personal) opinion has changed..
I still say they can be/work for SOME--and I'm seeing/have seen it personally on here..--but I don't believe they're for me..
Yes, granted, that was the ONLY LDR I'd had, but...still..
*sighs and * I just... .
Best of luck to all who're pursuing one, have had it work out for them, etc. .
unc
[Edited 5/13/2008 7:43:02 AM]
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| 5/13/2008 8:27:48 AM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
leather_n_lace3
Cheyenne, WY
age: 49
| They are difficult at best.
I agree.
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| 5/13/2008 5:04:16 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
maylynnshine
Merrillville, IN
age: 53
| Hi, my name is Sunshine,and my opinion on long distance relationships is . It can work depending on the two individuals.I am in a long distance relationship right now. My sweetheart lives in Georgia and I live in Indiana. We not only communicate via internet but we speak by phone every day and night. Of course we both have unlimited long distance on the phone. But to have that type of relationship ther have to be commitment and trust. Also sacrifices have to be made on both parties. You have to find a time to physically be together to see how you respond to each other in person. One of you have to make a trip!!! If you two connect then the next time the other make the trip. If things continue to go well,and of course you fall in love and you both decide you don't want to be seperated any more by the distance of the cities. Then you both have to compromise and sacrifice and decide who's gonna make the move to be in the same city or you both relocate to another city. Im leaving real soon to go to Georgia to be with my sweetie and we have had these discussions. He seems to be a wonderful man and I pray this is the end of my journey for a husband. Im a true believer,through God all things are possible. When we are apart in our seperate cities, I just look at it as though my man is in the service and Im home waiting to see him again. As long as we love each other, make our trips to be together and continue to have God in our lives. We will come together as one.
Sunshine
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| 5/13/2008 5:39:37 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
frantino
Brooklyn, NY
age: 33
| Long distance relationships can/will work as long as you know what your getting into and your not jumping in half c*cked.
Dont give up your whole life for someone you dont really know.
Long distance realtionships work as long as there is trust.
Sometimes its better to be far away at first this way it allows time to get to know eachother.
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| 5/14/2008 2:14:33 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
pointy
Houston, TX
age: 39
| bro.
i feel what your saying.
however..... if your into someone and they'er into you.
distance aint a problem.got a girl that lives 1500 miles away.
we talk every night.it's like we'er in each others arms.
yea it's hard to be seperated. but when your into some one your really not apart.
you know?as far as kids it's up to the both of you to take care of him/her.
don't know if i proved you wrong or not bro.
just expressing my view.
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| 5/14/2008 2:20:33 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
skittlez200218
Hiddenite, NC
age: 24
| I had someone relocate to be with me that lived 7 hours away. It wasn't easy, but because he cared about me, he was determined to see that we worked out. He moved in, found a new job (even better than what he had), and left all he knew to be with me. We eventually didn't work out, but neither of us regret the decision that he made. He now lives about 30 mins from me and seems more happy in this area than where he was before. I guess what I'm saying is that eventually, if you two care about each other, someone is going to want to make that jump. For me, it was scary and exciting at the same time to know that I was cared about that much. I'll never forget him for the leap of faith he took in what he felt we had.
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| 5/14/2008 2:26:12 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
harley9482
Fort Wayne, IN
age: 25
| LDR is no harder or less secure than in town connections
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| 5/14/2008 3:10:38 PM | Opinions on long distance relationships? | |
looknforu419
Toledo, OH
age: 32
| ok sunshine but i said that one of you will have to move with one another thats the only way but good luck to you
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