12 Reasons Youre Afraid To Get Into A Relationship And Why You Need To Relax

This post was originally published on September 6, 2012.

Sometimes you might feel like you’re desperate to be in a relationship…until the possibility is right in front of you. (It’s like when you agree to go skydiving with a friend — then you see them jump out of the plane and you think, “No way am I doing that! Are you crazy?”) When trying to find love, often fear is the one, huge thing standing in the way. But you learned when you were three — with the whole “monsters under the bed” thing — that some fears are imaginary. Here are 12 ways fear interferes with love, and why you should kick it to the curb (and say yes to that relationship).

1

You’re afraid of heartbreak.

Let’s get this one out of the way right off the bat. Everyone is afraid of getting hurt. (Except for several of the villains in The Care Bears, I suppose. Those cold-hearted a-holes.) Doesn’t that make you feel better? If life were one big bumper car game, and we were all afraid of getting hurt, we would be a little more gentle with each other, wouldn’t we be? So let’s just all agree to be more honest with each other about our feelings, and more kind to one another in our relationships, and hope that some asshole doesn’t break the rules and ram us from out of nowhere, sending us to the chiropractor. But if you are afraid to enter a relationship because you are afraid of getting hurt, you are both a cliche and destined to go nowhere. (And as Dr. Phil would say, “how’s that working out for you?”)

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